Taking care of business
by Turkaholic
Summary: Sequel to Tseng's Company Reno and Tseng are ordered to save the Vice president from being kidnapped - someone they'd both rather have left for dead... TsengxReno Angst, Language, WIP, Yaoi, Shonen-ai [ON HIATUS; NOT ABANDONED!(SEE NOTE AT END OF CHAPTER 16)]
1. Chapter 1

_Note: Well, here's the first chapter of the sequel I promised you all. I cant promise how regular its going to be between chapters this time, but I'm gonna try as often as possible to put something up. If it's been a while and you're wondering where the next chapter is, its probably best to take a look in my LiveJournal and see what's happening (.com). I DO have a lot of college work right now though, so no promises..._

_**Before anyone asks - The Reno I use here IS NOT the Reno from Advent Children**__ All the characters I use are based on those from the original game, so please dont make comparisons between the two, they're very different people. If you haven't played the game? Do it. It's better than the film. I promise._

_**Also...**__ This is the sequel to my other fic Tseng's Company. If you haven't read that first it might be a good idea..._

_**Reviews**__ Anyone who reviews my chapters are very luffly people and deserve lots and lots of Shiny things. Seriously though, reviews do me a lot of favours, and make me want to write more. Thanks in advance to anyone who does. ^^;_

-

Chapter One

It wasn't like I wasn't used to this stuff, hanging around a car in the dead of night, waiting for Rude and Tseng to come back so I could get the hell home. I mean, come on, I'm a Turk - it doesn't bother me.

You wanna know what does bother me?

Freezing my nuts off as I wait, thats what.

Which, coincidentally, was what I was doing right now. Slouching against Tseng's car outside some crappy pawn shop down in sector 2. I could only assume from the thudding and crashing I could hear inside, that Tseng and Rude were kicking the owner's ass. Now don't get me wrong - I love a good ass kicking as much as the next guy, but not when I'm standing outside to make sure nobody else goes in, and freezing my nuts to icecubes in the process. That bit, believe it or not, aint so fun. And I'd been doing it for a whole half an hour here.

It was a late winter night in the slums of Midgar.

I lit up a cigarette and yawned boredly, shivering slightly before shoving a hand into my pocket. Across from me in the alleyway at the side of the shop, a cat scurried across, casting a dim shadow from the nearly dead streetlight next to the car. Half an hour of sitting out here while Tseng and Rude had all the damn fun, and the most interesting thing I'd seen all night was a cat. Let me tell ya, as _entertaining_ as that is, this was no way the evening I'd had in mind before Heidigger had called us in for this little extra-curricular activity. My night had been planned out with a pizza for two, a certain Wutaian's double bed, a certain pair of SOLDIER issue handcuffs and a bucketload of chocolate sauce, but apparently that little dessert was off the menu thanks to this.

If I ever get the chance? Remind me to kick Heidigger in the nuts a couple of hundred times. Or better yet - stick 'em in a bucket of ice water for half an hour, then maybe he'd feel like I did right now.

_I wait much damn longer, I'm gonna freeze into a new hood ornament for Tseng's car._

Yeah... if you dont know me yet? I'm an impatient, impetuous, stupid and wayward son of a bitch. It takes a hell of a lot to make me pay attention to an order, and even when I do its only for a while - as soon as my attention span's gone the whole thing goes to hell, and my attention span had well and truly run out. I was pissed off after waiting half an hour wondering what they were doing, and freezing my ass off in the process. Especially since tonight was one of the rare times me and Tseng actually got where we could meet at his apartment and be sure we weren't being watched. So whatever it was Rude and Tseng were doing in here, I figured I'd give them a helping hand.

Ok so maybe chocolate sauce was outta the question now, but if I hurried them up we might still have time for handcuffs.

I pushed myself off the side of the car and slouched over, flicking the cigarette to the floor as I headed on in, kicking open the already battered in door and heading finally into the warm. On the minus side the air in here smelled like crap, but hey I guess you can't win 'em all, huh?

"You really think this is doing you any good?" Tseng's low, purring voice echoed from up ahead, sending a smutty smirk sliding up the side of my face as I jumped over the crap in front of the entrance that the guy had tried to blockade the door with when we'd first arrived. Not that it had done him any good, considering his current position - collapsed in a bloody heap at a way too calm looking Tseng's feet. "If you didn't want this to happen, you shouldn't have stolen from Shinra... and if you didn't want this to happen, you wouldn't be stupid enough not to tell us where you're hiding them."

Rude stood at the side of him and cracked his knuckles loudly for effect. He likes doing that - cracking his knuckles at people to freak them out. And hey lets face it - if a huge guy like him with a bald head and a crazy aversion to words walked up to ya in the street cracking his knuckles? You'd run away, crying like a baby.

The guy on the floor in front of Tseng, however, didn't. Rude had pretty much pummeled his face into a complete damn mess, but from somewhere he was still managing to glare at Tseng through bloodsoaked eyes.

"I'm not... hiding anything." He hissed painfully, and spat at Tseng's shoe.

As usual, Tseng looked pretty unphased, staring straight back with those hands folded across his chest. Or at least... he was, until I came lurching into view. Tseng's eyes snapped up to meet mine, face so damn cold I could have been looking at a block of ice rather than an actual damn person. But I knew that look, and heck I was used to it. I just grinned evilly, shrugged and leaned against a display cabinet full of materia in the middle of the room.

"What part of 'stand guard' did you not understand?" He snapped darkly. I just lit up a cigarette casually and adjusted the goggles on my head. In any other damn situation I would've tried to squirm out of it with some kind of half baked excuse, but Tseng was in the middle of interrogating some poor asshole, so he wasn't gonna have time to chide me and it seemed pretty pointless.

I tell ya... there's nothing funner than watching Tseng go crazy at how much of a lazy ass I can be. There's also nothing more dangerous. Hell one of these days I'm just expecting the guy to up and kick the crap outta me in total exhasperation.

"You aughtta try standing out in the damn cold for half an hour and let _me_ interrogate some son of a bitch someday." I said with a shrug, and folded my arms across my chest. I watched with utter damn amusement as Tseng stared at me darkly, the corner of his eye twitched for just a fraction of a second before he opened his mouth silently, probably decided that arguing with me would be pointless, and turned his back on me and headed back to the bloodied-up Pawn shop owner. Rude just stood there, dumb as ever, holding on to the guy's shoulder tightly. He nodded at me and grunted, which when translated kinda means 'how ya doin', Reno?' Or at least, over the past two and a half years of knowing the guy, thats what I've guessed it means. On the other hand, he could've been telling me I smelled of crap and I wouldn't've known the damn difference.

Heh... Rude... Mr. fucking Non-Verbal of Shinra Inc. He should get a damn medal for it sometime.

Tseng leaned down next to the guy on the floor, forcing the poor son of a bitch to look away and hell I dont blame him - Out of work hours, Tseng's... well, to be pretty honest he's actually kinda a decent guy, as difficult as it is to admit that, but as soon as he gets up, puts that suit on... well... lets just say if you piss him off, you might wanna go and hide under a rock for a while til he puts down any sharp objects. And I'm definitely talking from experience here.

Anyway... the thing is when the son of a bitch is serious, he gets this look. You know? The kind of look that feels so vicious it could probably melt your damn skin off if he used it on you long enough, and that was how he was looking at the guy on the floor in front of him right now. Apparently I wasn't the only one getting impatient, and I could guess that what was on Tseng's mind was probably the same thing as on mine. Heidigger's phonecall had interrupted us in the middle of a pretty damn enjoyable make-out session, after all...

"Final chance..." He growled, dark Wutaian eyes burning into the other's face . "Unless you start telling us where you put those stolen weapons... we start removing body parts."

...OK then. I guess Tseng really _was_ impatient.

A tip - never interrupt a pair of horny Turks in the middle of a makeout session. Odds are, it'll end up with severed bodyparts.

The guy on the floor squeaked and shook his head nervously, beads of sweat dripping from his face onto the concrete floor. Tseng's eyes narrowed in annoyance and he stood up, putting a hand in his pocket to take out a knife. The guy on the floor squeaked some more and tried to back away from Tseng. Rude just held his shoulder harder and both of us watched and waited for Tseng to pull out his knife.

The thing was... that knife never came out of his pocket. In fact, for about twenty whole seconds, all Tseng did was stand there with his hand still stuck in his pocket as his eyes - just a second ago filled with venom - widened slightly, staring at what Reno the asshole here thought was the wall behind me.

It was only when I heard a gun cock carefully behind me and the barrel rest against the back of my head that I realised that coming in from the cold was probably one of the most stupid ideas this complete braindead prick of a Turk had ever had.

"One move, Turk, and I'll blow your fucking head off."

I took one huge gulp of air, stared straight at the faint look of horror of Tseng's face, and said the only damn thing that would come outta my mouth at the time:

"...ah... fuck."


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 2

I stood as still as I could as the guy behind me tapped the muzzle of the gun against my head warningly not to move. Heh... not that I needed the hint. I've seen what the hell a gun does to a guy at close range and trust me, it aint pretty. I had no intention of redecorating this place with my brains.

...well... what was left of them anyway.

In front of me, Tseng's fists clenched and he started to blanch white slowly - one of those rare times on the job when he let slip that he actually gave some sort of damn about me other than as a moron of a subordinate. But just for a second, what I was thinking was more along the lines of wondering how the hell I was gonna get out of this one, and how much I'd rather have stayed out in the cold than have a gun pointing at my head right now.

It went completely silent for a second, Rude and Tseng stock still like statues in front of me, Rude still holding stubbornly to the owner's shoulder like some kind of human comfort blanket. I could only guess that there were guns pointing at them too, as I heard another 'click' behind me - the sound of someone else cocking a gun.

Guess we were in a pretty bad situation here, huh?

I gulped and growled in the back of my throat. Having a gun pointed at the back of your head on a regular basis? Mostly goes with the job, but lemme tell ya, it doesn't get any funner the more it happens. Plus to be pretty honest that look on Tseng's face was making me feel pretty torn up. Dammit why do I have to be such an obsessed son of a bitch? I got a gun at my head, and the thing I was worried about the most was Tseng. Guess I really am a sucker for the guy. I frowned and tried to move one of my hands inside my jacket slowly to get Lola (my gun. Yeah yeah I named my gun, so sue me) from her holster. The guy with the gun to my head just yanked at my 'tail and growled in warning. Ok then, that was option A outta the damn window.

_Wait a sec Reno, get that lazy-ass brain into gear and think. There's gotta be some way..._

My thoughts were interrupted when I heard footsteps behind, coming in the door and past the broken barricade. Hard, heavy footfall. Whoever the hell they were, they were definitely walking in with a purpose, and I didn't figure that they were here just to deliver the damn post.

I followed Tseng's eyes as they surveyed... whoever the hell it was that just came in the door, watching that sinister glare spread across his face as the footsteps stopped. The guy who they belonged to had stopped next to me, and was currently surveying my face like I was a fucking circus freak, though his face wasn't exactly Mr Average Joe's.

The guy was Wutaian, that was easy enough to see. He had dark charcoal eyes that glinted sinisterly in the cheap electric light of the shop, and slicked back black hair like Tseng's only not as long (and nowhere near as sexy). That wasn't the thing that drew my eye though. The thing that really stood out, was that the whole left side of his face was covered in slice-like scars, as though someone had laid the guy down and used his face for a chopping board for a damn month. He had an aura that just screamed 'psycho', which is why... looking back, I wonder why the hell I opened my damn mouth

"What the hell you lookin' at, you piece of crap?" I sneered at the guy.

...Wrong move Reno, definitely the wrong goddamn move.

The Wutaian raised an eyebrow, almost in amusement. "I'm not exactly sure..." A grimace passed over his face and a moment later I felt something sharp and cold press against my throat lightly. A razor. I tensed up and tried not to wince. "let's see..." He growled me, narrowing his eyes. "How about I open it up and find out."

"And you are?" Tseng butted in suddenly, and I could swear that just for a second, that was desperation in the guy's voice. Not that anybody would be able to tell. Well, anybody but me, anyhow. And in any other situation, I would've been beaming with pride that I could get that kind of emotion from the cold son of a bitch. But when you're being used as a hostage it's kind of hard to get egocentric, even for me.

The guy let the razor pull away from me and he turned to face Tseng, letting me relax just a little. He sighed.

"If you have to ask me, I'm disappointed in you. I thought the Turks were meant to be the most informed operation in Shinra. And when I get here what do I see? A group of common thugs, beating an innocent man to near unconsciousness."

Almost on cue, the pawn shop owner coughed self-pityingly and spat up blood onto the floor.

Tseng tensed up visibly at those words, like the other Wutaian had just insulted his mother or something. Heh... one thing ya can't say about Tseng is that he takes this work lightly...

"I see..." Tseng glanced down at the beaten guy on the floor with a cold, unconcerned eyebrow raised. "I take it it was you who stole those weapons instead?" He asked flatly, yet again jumping ahead of me in the brains department. It would have taken me maybe a whole half an hour to consider that. Hell it would've taken Rude about a day, but there ya go - there's a reason why he's the boss, and that was it.

The scarred guy nodded and smirked. "I also made an annonymous call to Shinra, informing them that this poor idiot had them, if that's what you were wondering."

...Huh?

This whole thing was a set up? And Heidigger had sent us straight into it.

Son of a bitch.

Tseng just stood there, an indifferent look on his face. Then after a second, someone else spoke. Someone I hadn't expected to even grunt in this conversation but yup, there he was, speaking, and saying... something that made my jaw just goddamn drop in horror.

"Yeah? If it was that much fuckin' trouble, why don't you just shoot us?"

Both me and Tseng's eyes snapped across to the suddenly out of his damn tree and suicidal Rude, who had his lip curled up in that evil smirk that he sometimes gets when he's pissed off as hell. He still had his grip on the pawn shop owner's shoulder, digging into it as though it were foam. Apparently the guy on the floor was getting panicky - his eyes were wild with the pain Rude was inflicting and the horror of being surrounded by idiots with guns. I just blinked. What the hell was Rude thinking? Had the guy just lost his goddamn mind? My jaw stayed where it was - nearly hitting the floor as the scarred creep began to grin gruesomely. From the look in his eyes, I was figuring he liked that idea.

"If thats the way you want it." He chuckled, and those psychotic looking Wutaian eyes narrowed harshly. All I could do was glare at the guy as he turned and sneered at me. I managed to keep my loud mouth shut this time. I figured that speaking right now would probably take me on a little roadtrip down death valley a hell of a lot faster than Rude had just guaranteed.

But not by much.

"Start with the ponytailed freak."

Oh... holy crap. Thanks Rude, you just handed me a fucking death sentence!

I felt the gun press harder against the back of my head and I winced, muttering some kinda curse on Rude, but my eyes were drawn back over to Tseng on the other side of the room, who for a change looked just as damn horrified as I'd been, but I frowned and gritted my teeth instead. If there's one thing that son of a bitch has taught me, it's to go out with a little goddamn dignity. Besides, I was looking at Tseng right now, and I figured... if I was gonna die here, I may as well go out looking into the eyes of the guy I loved.

Ah hell who cares if it sounds cheesy? I was facing my own damn death here, I wasn't too concerned with whether what I was thinking was too goddamned girly.

"A-AAAAAAAHH!"

Before I got the chance to even think of any slick last words, the whole damn room was engulfed in an earsplitting scream. It took me a while to realise what the hell had happened.

Rude had just ripped the guy on the floor's shoulder out of joint and let go of him. Everyone in the room just stared in surprise at Rude's none-too-smart looking face as the pawn shop owner writhed around on the floor for a second, screaming to his damn self and holding his arm pathetically. This was the point where I was pretty sure Rude was outta his tree. Actually no - Rude wasn't just outta his tree, but he was about a mile and a half _away_ from his fucking tree. Tseng didn't exactly look too impressed either...

"Very impressive." The freak next to me butted in sarcasticly, then just snorted and looked back at me. But my eyes were on Rude still... there was something going on in that asshole's head, and I was trying to figure out what it was.

I wasn't quick enough though. The next thing I knew, Rude muttered something to the writhing mass of bloody flesh on the floor, a second later it had picked itself up in a panic, screamed again and started running away towards the entrance, everyone's eyes following it in utter damn confusion.

Heh... everyone except me anyhow. Despite what people tell me, and despite what my brain might have me think most of the damn time - I aint stupid. And I sure as hell aint got a death wish - I'm a self centered son of a bitch. So somehow I figured this diversion was the only chance I was gonna get, nodded at Tseng in some kinda warning and ran the fuck for the nearest cover I could find. It just happened to be the shop counter next to Rude and Tseng, which they were already climbing over by the time the gunshots started. Apparently the others had finally realised that their hostage was getting away, and were pretty damn unhappy about it.

One second I was running across the room, the next the air around me was filled with goddamn bullets whizzing past my head, missing by near inches. The only thing I could do was grit my teeth and hope to hell that one of them didn't strike home. Tseng and Rude knelt up and gave me some covering fire as I threw myself into the air, slid across the counter and nearly landed head first into Tsengs lap. Hey not that that would exactly be a bad thing, but I was more concerned with wondering wether I actually had been hit. My whole damn body was numb with the adrenaline of nearly being shot, so I wouldn't know even if I'd got a bullet in the ass on my way over. I seemed to be in one piece though, and even though I nearly knocked the guy off his feet in my lameass attempt to dive over the table, I could swear Tseng's hand didn't rest on mine by accident as he corrected himself, still shooting at what turned out to be three others, who had managed to find cover behind that materia cabinet and were doing the same. The guy with the scarred face didn't exactly seem too put out that I'd got away, which actually creeped me out more than a little. This wasn't the time to get freaked out though. That could happen when I'd survived and was getting happily drunk at home.

"Welcome back Reno." Rude grunted and smirked at me smarmily, apparently pretty proud of somehow getting me out of that tricky situation. Ugh... I could tell just from the look on his face he was gonna make me buy him a hell of a lot of drinks before he let me live this down. I just nodded and patted him on the shoulder, pulling out Lola to help with the shootout that was happening around me.

"We need to make it back to the car." Tseng growled over the whizz of bullets, one of those damn serious looks on his face as he finally moved his hand away from mine reluctantly, placing it on the floor to steady himself. "they've got the advantage here, all we can do is retreat to the car and get back up to the plate."

Rude grunted in agreement and started peering around for an escape route. Me? I didn't answer. I was too preoccupied trying to shoot the son of a bitch that had yanked my 'tail earlier. Believe it or not, I tend to hold grudges over things like that. The one problem was that as we were shooting the hell out of the materia case, the scarred freak was slowly sliding his hand inside it, still ducked down safely behind cover as his hand slid through the now broken glass, searching for something.

"Uh... boss..."

I saw Tseng's eyes narrow as he saw what was happening. Materia aint exactly as effective as a gun unless you work on it, but damn, it could still pack a punch, and this guy's hand was wandering over towards a piece of fire materia...

Tseng shook his head, still crazily calm as he surveyed the situation, as though he was just watching a movie or something. We were running out of time. They were between us and the entrance, and if that guy got his hands on some fire materia, our asses were burned to a crisp. And I was thinking that Turk flambe wasn't exactly gonna be the tastiest dish in the world.

"Seems we dont have much time to make a plan." Tseng said lowly, ducking as a bullet potholed the glass weapons case behind him. "We might have to run for it." He nodded at us grimly. "Reno? Rude?"

We both nodded back silently and headed to the side of the counter, pretty sure that what we were about to do was the equivalent of standing up and screaming 'shoot me' at them. But we didn't have much of a choice here. Well, we did, but the other option was to end up as three neat piles of ash - one with a pair of sunglasses, one with an Electro Rod, and the other with a weird forehead dot on top.

"One..." Tseng growled. It was then my stupidly slow brain decided to work.

...hold on one sec... weapons cabinet?

"Two..."

WEAPONS cabinet? How the hell did I miss that one?

"THREE!"

I sighed and shook my head as I tugged Tseng and Rude back from the kamikazee run.

...you complete moron Reno.


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter 3

The dark and silence of Midgar's polluted slums was slowly shattered a moment later. First by the sound of a weapons cabinet smashing, then a faint tapping as a grenade bounced across a certain pawn shop's concrete floor. There was the sound of two pretty surprised shrieks as they realised what the hell it was bouncing towards them, the sound of heavy footfall as the other one had enough brains to actually run away, then one huge mother of a bang errupted, taking with it one pretty crappily made materia display case, about twenty pieces of crappy materia, and two complete assholes that thought the duck and cover tecnique would ward off a full blown explosion.

If there was anyone actually left sleeping in the damn slums after that, they had to be either dead, drugged, or deaf as a goddamn post. Anyone who was crazy enough to look outta their windows to see what the hell had happened would've just seen three singed Turks emerging from a smoking building, peering around to make sure there weren't more assholes out here and then stalking over to an expensive looking car, dusting themselves off.

"Rude..." Tseng said calmly as he opened the car door, climbing in to the driver's seat, "just out of interest, what was it you said to that pawn shop owner?"

Rude chuckled lowly and adjusted his sunglasses, looking back at the smoking building.

"I said if he stayed there I was gonna break his other shoulder."

Tseng 'hmmed' what I guessed was a laugh as I slid into the passenger seat beside him. Rude climbed in the back, flicking a piece of charred masonry off his shoulder, as his face returned to that straight faced bored look. Tseng didn't exactly seem the happiest guy on the planet either, hands clamped to the wheel and that way too thoughtful look on his face. Almost made me with my stupid grin feel out of place around here. Well excuse me for being happy I didn't end up with my brains decorating the wall...

I sighed and slid down contentedly in Tseng's leather seat, hands behind my head and a contented smirk on my face. "Hey don't everybody thank me at once then, after all I did just save -"

"Reno shut up." Tseng snapped, eyes fixed on the road just in front of the car. Rude behind me grunted and placed a hand on my shoulder in warning.

"Yeah Reno, shut up."

I blinked in confusion. Was I... missing something here? What the hell did I do?

I was about to ask that out loud, when Tseng turned in his seat to glare at me. And not just one of his 'I'm gonna put you on a charge' glares either. This was Tseng's hardcore psychosis glare - the one that I hardly ever saw, and when I did I ran pretty far pretty fast. With Rude grabbing to my shoulder though, that wasn't really an option.

"The word 'idiot' is a thousand times too lenient a word to describe how utterly stupid you are." He growled dangerously, leaning in towards me. I opened my mouth to say something, but Tseng didn't give me the damn chance. "You nearly got all three of us killed tonight because you refused to listen to my orders. If you weren't one of my Turks, I'd shoot you through the head just to see if it even changed how much you used your brain."

"Hey! Dammit I just..." I trailed off patheticly.

Ok so I'm a Turk, there's a lot I'm not afraid of, but damn Tseng can freak me out when he wants to. I don't even think he was joking about that last part either... I tried to keep myself under control though... I had the overwhelming urge to curl up and try to disappear somewhere from that glare, but instead I just gulped and frowned at him, scratching the back of my neck awkwardly. Heh... amazing aint it? I'll talk back to a psycho with a gun pointing at my head, but when it comes to Tseng, my brain freezes up and doesn't let me even say anything. Fucking thing...

He slowly sat back in his seat and started up the car, turning back to the alleyway ahead. "Next time you do anything so moronic, if we survive, I'm going to demote you, and give your job to one of Hojo's experiments." He sighed. "At least then my second in command wouldn't be a complete imbecile."

Rude behind me slowly let go of my shoulder and sat back in his seat, leaving me with a sore shoulderblade, and one mother of a sore ego. I sank into my seat and folded my arms. I guess I had been pretty dumb, but dammit how the hell was I meant to know this was gonna turn into a shootout? I snorted, sat back and looked out the side windows as we passed the slums, heading for the road back up to the plate. I'd known Tseng for two and a half years now, and even when we didn't... yaknow... have this little arrangement, I'd never seen him so pissed at me. He'd been icy before, yeah, but actually pissed off to this degree? I felt my stomach lurch. Guess this meant plans with me and Tseng were off for tonight, huh? My heart sank into the floor and I sighed. Being the out-of-hours kissass I am, I hate it when Tseng blocks me out. Fuck, I'd just go back to my place and get outta my face drunk. Yeah, that might make me feel a little better. On the other hand it might make me feel even more crappy than I already did, but I was willing to take the gamble.

***

Rude's apartment aint too far from mine - on the wrong side of Midgar, in the bad part of town. A ten minute walk (or stagger, depending on wether I'd started drinking already) through Midgar from my scummy little apartment landed me at Rude's door, which meant I could bug the asshole when I didn't have anything better to do, with the added bonus that his place was right across the road from the nearest bar, which is where I spent most of my time passed out and sprawled over a table in the corner when I wasn't at work, or when Tseng and me couldn't get together for a little fun. Not tonight though. I was in the mood for some heavy lone drinking on my sofa, to be followed by a few hallucinations, passing out on the kitchen floor, followed by morning where I'd nurse my hangover, drive to work and get a still pissed off Tseng snapping at me icily for being late to work.

Yup, I had my night well and truly planned out.

Rude grunted at me and nodded as we pulled up outside his place. All three of us had been silent since Tseng had ripped my head off down in the slums. Not that that was unusual for those two sons of bitches, but normally I shoot my mouth off just to keep myself entertained. Not now though. I was pretty sure if I opened my mouth right now Tseng would smash my damn head through the windshield. I just nodded back at Rude as he got out of the car. He seemed to have forgiven me, but not Mr Cold-sonofabitch next to me. I just scratched my head and tried to avoid eye contact as Tseng turned to me again. Dammit boss, leave me alone would ya? I was just hoping he'd drop me off at my place without saying anything else.

Fat chance.

He sat there silently for a second and watched me. I tried to look as though there was something really interesting about watching Rude disappear into his apartment.

"What you did..." He growled finally, and then trailed off.

"...Boss?"

Silence. Finally I gathered enough courage to look over. Tseng was sitting there, eyes closed and pinching the bridge of his nose stressfuly.

"You nearly got yourself killed, Reno."

...now you gotta understand me - I'm not too great at tact. It's one of my oh-so-many failings, and I got a tendency to put my foot, my ankle, and my whole damn leg in my mouth on a daily basis. That's why more often than not, Tseng makes my life a damn misery at work, and why out of hours, I sometimes dont have a clue what to say. Now was one of those times - those out of hours occasions when I didn't know what the hell to say to him. So instead of saying something that might've actually gotten me out of the crap I was in, idiot-boy Reno here went for the humor approach.

"Heh... look on the bright side, Tseng. If I'd ended up dead, 'least you wouldn't have to tidy up after my ass anymore." I shrugged, smirking sheepishly and hoping to hell Tseng would shut up about how badly I screwed up tonight. Tseng just glanced up at me grimly, the mako-green-tinted skyline of Midgar glinting back at me in those obsidian eyes. Suddenly something there hit me.

Dammit, Tseng wasn't pissed off at me for getting him and Rude in danger. He was pissed off at me for getting _me_ in danger.

...I guess, this was Tseng's weird, abstract, none-too-logical way of saying he was worried about me. Well... if this was Tseng's usual way of showing his emotions, then no damn wonder the guy confused me to hell and back so often.

Tseng beside me sighed slowly and turned back to the wheel, as I gulped back down a 'sorry' that I'd been trying to force out of my damn throat as it sank in. Now it was my turn to sigh, staring out the side window again.

"Reno...?"

"Mmm?" I looked over as Tseng started up the car, staring ahead at the road neutrally. His eyes narrowed slightly.

"Your wages are docked... thirty percent."

I blinked and opened my mouth stupidly. That wasn't fair! Ten percent, ok I could deal with, but... thirty? Dammit that was my drink money down the drain for the month...

"Dammit Tseng, Rude didn't even get that much when he put laxatives in Scarlet's coffee!" I protested moodily. Even if it had been damn funny at the time, this was much more serious. Tseng just blinked slowly, unphazed and catlike as ever.

"That's because I know who dared Rude to do it." He said smoothly. I tried to look out the window innocently and pretend I didn't know what he meant. "If I were you, Reno, I'd be quiet. I could easily decide that thirty percent isn't quite enough... or I could just suspend you again."

Enough said. Even if I wanted to argue, I was too tired and I knew I wasn't about to win. In the end I just let out a melancholy sigh and stuck my chin in my hands sulking like a schoolkid. Something which I've become used to doing since I became a Turk because lets face it - whenever Tseng's brain and mine collide? It's pretty obvious the winner isn't gonna be the redhead's over here.

The car ride back to my place was silent. I've had a lot of silent car-rides with Tseng before, but not for a while, and the last one had been about four months ago - one of the worst goddamn silences I ever had to deal with. Which is why, now that we were back to the silent treatment, I wasn't exactly enjoying myself.

In fact, it made me feel kind of sick. Not because Tseng wasn't talking to me, not because the son of a bitch _still_ wouldn't let me smoke in his flashy car, but just out of rememberance of what had happened that day, four months ago. The worst day of my life, actually, but I'll explain about that later. Right now all you needed to know was that me and Tseng hadn't said a word after we left Rude's place. And it made me feel Sick.

I had my hands still holding my chin up, as though if I let go my head was gonna just fall on the floor without the support. OK, I'll admit - I was/am/will always be an idiot, but did he have to drive that home by taking my damn wages? Turks aint exactly the most high paid Shinra employees anyway. In fact, despite the classy suits we're probably the worst paid sons of bitches in the Tower, so why do that?

Because he wanted to punish me properly, thats why. He knew a suspension would just give me an excuse to lounge around for a few weeks. Taking my beer money? That wasn't punishment.

That was _torture_

I'd found one speck of dirt on the dashboard, which was keeping me entertained and out of eye contact with Tseng as we drove along, passing street lights, shops, bars, hotels... It was only when I looked up after about fifteen minutes, wondering if Tseng was taking some extra extra long shortcut, that I realised something.

I blinked dumbly for a second, staring at the streets in confusion, then I redirected my gormless look at the Wutaian in the seat next to me, whose face seemed to have jammed itself into neutral.

"Uh... Tseng?" I said slothishly, too confused to make my words come out any more concisely. He 'mmmed' at me in traditional Tseng fashion.

"...this isn't the way to my apartment."

It might have been the Mako reflection from the reactors just playing tricks on me, or even the lights from the flashy hotels we were passing, but I could've sworn that just for the tiniest fraction of a second, the sliver of a smirk glanced across Tseng's face. Then he went back to that annoying neutral and raised an eyebrow.

"Reno... if you think I'm going to let you go home so you can sulk and drink yourself unconscious, then you're more of an idiot than I thought you were." He sighed exhasperatedly, turning a corner towards the gateway for sector 1, and leaving me completely bewildered by how the hell he'd read my mind. "You can sulk just as comfortably in my apartment, I'm sure. And besides..." he licked his lips at this point, making my Dirty Mind promptly jump into action, as I've no damn doubt he meant it to, "It's only midnight. I don't think even you have the ability to sulk right through until morning... do you?"

Gah, devious bastard. He had to know there was no way I could say 'yes' after that. Dammit just the thought of him licking his lips was enough for my sex drive to be well and truly up and running, and he knew it - I could see the faintest glow of humor in his eyes as he simply carried on driving. All I could do was shrug and sigh, surrendering to the might that was Tseng's sex appeal. I'll admit - I'm a pushover when it comes to him - so sue me.

"I dunno... I guess you could persuade me." I licked my own lips. "...depends what you got to bribe me with."

OK, and Tseng was downright _smirking_ now and not even making the tiniest effort to hide it. I couldn't help but just smirk with him as we stopped outside Tseng's classy apartment block, Tseng turning the car off as a simple 'oh?' escaped those rarely-upturned lips of his, before he leaned over and looked me straight in the eyes, an eyebrow cocked coyly.

"Well... I don't know about a bribe, but... if you decide you want to stop sulking..." He reached up and placed a hand on my jawline, tracing it slowly. "I'm sure I could think of a few things to keep you happy." He murmured, trailing his fingers slowly down my neck. I closed my eyes and growled softly. A second later, Tseng's lips locked with mine - just for a second, just for a teasing moment before he backed off with a wicked smirk and got out of the car.

"_If_ you decide to stop sulking, that is."

A second later, after a halfhearted groan at the loss of contact, and a slow, savouring lick of my lips, I got out and followed Tseng into the apartment block, smirking smuttily all the way. If there was one thing Tseng knew how to do besides kill people, it was how to get a guy worked up.


	4. Chapter 4

Chapter 4

There are a few things that the optimistic half of my brain often forgets. The first is that, no matter how many times I apply for the jobs, Shinra Inc is not going to appoint me President, Protector of the Ladies' Shower Room, or a Professional Donut Eater. The other thing is a fact that just seeps outta my brain every time I really need it to stay put, and that fact is this:

Tseng's like an elephant: He never forgets.

This was something that was gonna come into play a little later, but ignore that for now. Right now I'd put it to the back of my mind, mostly cause something was... kind of distracting me.

Three guesses what that just might be.

I bit my lip and tried not to let out a sound as smooth, long, Wutaian fingers passed over my bare thighs, those dark, coal-like eyes boring into mine as a devious smirk flickered across that asshole's dark face. My entire damned body felt like it was on fire, my brain felt on fucking meltdown. I could barely remember who I was, where I was, and how the hell I'd gotten here, but to be honest I didn't damn well care. I vaguely recalled walking in Tseng's front door, expecting the guy to sit down on that swanky leather couch and pour himself the traditional brandy like the tightass he was, but apparently we'd skipped that part and moved straight onto Act 2 - in otherwords: The guy had practically pounced on me the moment I'd set foot through the door.

Not that I was complaining exactly, more surprised. I mean lets face it: the only thing I ever had Tseng down for pouncing on was the god damned coffee machine first thing in the morning.

Nonetheless, Tseng's silky hair slid against my chest as I felt his still smirking lips brush against my pulse point. All I could do was gulp, swear under my breath and arch my back up from the bed against dark, warm flesh; fingers relishing in the fact that they were getting one of those way too rare chances to touch that body - the body that drove me crazy every time Tseng did me the favour of showing it to me. Even though four months had passed since the guy had first stripped off in front of me, standing stark goddamn naked in my living room, the novelty still hadn't worn off. The fact was - and I damn well knew it - was that only one person ever got to see Tseng when he was like this, and that one guy was me.

That idea alone was enough to get me drooling all over my paperwork at least 20 times a day.

Tseng's fingers pushed apart my all too willing thighs slowly as his mouth latched itself over the most sensitive spot on my neck and began tracing his tongue against it slowly while a palm grazed against my member down below. I could practically hear the asshole smirking as I groaned and shuddered, clutching to his back, digging my nails into the skin like clinging to a goddamn cliff face, trying not to fall off. Jesus, but the guy knew what he was doing, and the next thing I knew, both my legs were wrapped tightly up and around Tseng's waist.

There was the tiniest pause, in which time my cheeks flushed up redder than a fucking slapped ass. I was used to my body overruling my brain and doing weird stuff in Tseng's presence by now, but it didn't make it any less embarassing. The Wutaian on top of me hesitated for a second, then pulled away and slowly raised his eyes to look at my face. I frowned and looked away, still panting and hoping to hell that the darkness would hide the blatent blush advertising its damn self like a neon sign across my face. Somehow though I aint exactly sure it worked.

I listened as Tseng licked his lips, my legs still clutched defiantly around that waist of his, my brain refusing to make them let go. Tseng purred, panther-like, his fingers still caressing my inner thigh.

"You're blushing."

"Am not." I muttered back thickly, every damn syllable dripping with maturity. And I still couldn't look him in the eye. Tseng, I knew, was eyeing me knowingly.

"Then why, Reno of the Turks, have you gone red?" He mumbled against my neck quietly, breath beating against my pulse point in what the fuck I knew wasn't any accident.

It took a very, v-e-r-y long time for me to process the fact that he'd just asked me a question, and even then I could feel long fingers trailing ever closer to my aching, touch-starved groin, distracting my already pretty limited brain power towards the idea of just sticking a hand down there and doing the god damned job myself. Therefore, the answer I ended up giving was probably not gonna end up in the Smartest Comments Hall of Fame.

"...I dunno... Sunburn?"

All hail Reno: it takes a lotta practice to come up with an answer as dumb as that.

Tseng backed off a little, no longer smirking but with a hell of a lot of humour in his eyes as I finally managed to look at him with a sheepish grin. He took a brief look out of the curtained window and raised an eyebrow at me.

"Hn, In the middle of the night, in Midgar?"

I just shrugged, grinning so hard I swear my mouth started to hurt. "I've uh... got -really- sensitive skin."

Tseng's eyes glowed like marbles, only way warmer, as they flashed in the neon lights of the theatre district way down below. "Reno," he purred with a chuckle, shaking his head. "You have a really sensitive -everything-"

I just raised an eyebrow indignantly, subconsciously tracing my fingers over Tseng's chest, "Yaknow boss, a guy could take offense at tha-"

Sensitive Reno then proved his point by arching his back and gasping as Tseng brushed just one finger against my member, then raised an eyebrow back at me as if he'd just won some kind of argument.

Fuck it. Tseng - 1, Pride - 0. One of the rare occasions when I really do wish I had more control over my body parts.

"Ah... that... don't prove anything." I gulped defiantly as Tseng pulled his hand away again tauntingly, amusement written all over that normally stoic face. Looking back, I shoulda realised that saying something like that to the Head of the Turks is kinda like painting your ass red and bending over in front of a pissed off bull. It was a challenge, and if there was one thing I knew about Tseng, it was that he never backed down from a challenge.

I growled impatiently as Tseng suddenly moved his hands away from my groin and slithered them slowly up my chest, my 'sensitive' body unable to do anything but arch against the touch automatically, like a puppet responding to the tug of a string. Before I had a chance to force my back down against the sheets Tseng had reattatched his lips to my pulse point, sucking at it ruthlessly.

Damn that asshole, he was drawing this shit out on purpose, I fucking knew it. He knew just how to press my god damn buttons... and keep pressing them til I was about ready to fucking pop.

As is being demonstrated in exhibit A here.

I growled again more forcefully as my eyes rolled back into my head in sheer exhasperation. Patience just aint one of my greatest features, yaknow? I mean... I get impatient waiting for doors to open, whereas the guy sucking at my neck like a blood starved vampire right now? Could outwait a piece of rock, given the chance.

"Oh holy hell... Tseng... just... just DO somethin... would ya?" I panted into his ear, unable to keep the pleading tone outta my voice for very long. Tseng simply purred that sexy Wutaian purr and carried on exactly what the hell he was doing. Merciless son of a bitch. Didn't he think that having my brains nearly blown out was enough tension for this Turk to handle in one night?

I guess the answer to that is pretty much 'no': After what felt like centuries of teasing, I suddenly realised Tseng had let go, and was mumbling something lowly in my ear. Now that I was coming to my senses, I suddenly realised something else too.

Tseng's hands were no longer on my chest. In fact, Tseng's god damn hands weren't even on my body. The bastard's hands were hovering far away from any part of me, over the already open top drawer in the bedside cabinet. Shit. I didn't even need to watch as the hand snaked inside and felt around purposefully, feeling for something cold and hard against it's fingertips. Through the lust-driven fog inside my brain, I finally registered what it was Tseng was muttering in my ear:

"Maybe I should prove how sensitive you can be."

A second later, Tseng was kneeling over me, dangling something from his fingers that swung and glinted dangerously in the light, an amused, but questioning eyebrow raised down at my bewildered face.

Ah... dammit.

I should never have lent the son of a bitch those handcuffs in the first place.

"You devious son of a bitch." I mumbled, though the smutty grin on my face might've downplayed those words just a little. Tseng raised his eyebrows even higher.

"If you were in uniform, I'd have you on a charge for those words, Reno." He growled, half playfully, leaning the handcuffs down and trailing the cold metal against my bare skin slowly. I gulped back the lust and grinned even wider

"...So does that mean... I won't get punished for anything if I come into work naked?" I asked, trying to force an innocent expression onto my face. Kinda difficult, seeing as I couldn't be innocent to save my fucking life. I'm corrupted baby, through and through. Tseng didn't fall for it, he just let a smirk cross his lips, trailed a finger gently down my chest and mumbled: "Oh you'd be punished... just not in accordance with company guidelines."

...Was that just a hint of... dirty talk? From Tseng? God, I sure as hell hoped so. Dirty talk with Tseng on the intra-office phones would make my office hours so much more productive. Messy, but productive. My member twitched impatiently just a little, but I managed to ignore it for once and just cocked my head to one side, trying to stick with the innocence thing, despite the fact that it was failing miserably.

"Oh yeah? How would that be exactly, Boss? Dock -all- my wages? Push me out a window?" Hopefully that idea wouldn't be too tempting.

Tseng lidded his eyes at me and flicked a tongue against those dark lips of his. This time, my member twitched against Tseng's leg, and he noticed - the smirk seemed just a little smugger than before. "Hmm... Not exactly."

Tseng was enjoying this way too damn much, but at the same time I knew he was playing it safe, I understood: we both knew that handcuffs and crap like that were pretty thin ice as far as I was concerned, and for a good reason. Four months ago, a boatload of crap had emptied itself all over me - I used to like the kinky stuff, now it just reminded me of... him.

But I was getting over it, getting back to myself, thanks to this guy and I trusted him more than even I wanted to fucking admit... but it was up to me to make the first move. Like I even needed to fucking think about it: Finally me and my penis were gonna agree on something. We both wanted him, and we both wanted him now.

I leaned up towards him on my elbows and licked my lips in response, eyes lidding heavily.

"Why don'cha show me?"

That was all the weird son of a bitch needed. Less than a second later, Tseng's lips and mine were crashing roughly into each other, and I didn't even think of pulling away as he pushed my hands up above my head and handcuffed me swiftly to the double bed with the kinda finesse that comes from years of experience in tying people up.

Yaknow... for the first time, I guess I'm glad I chose a career as a hired hitman. Might not be the best paid job, but you can bet your ass we're hell in the sack.


	5. Chapter 5

as ever... reviews and comments are always appreciated 3

Chapter 5

I've been with a lot of chicks in my time. Can I help it? I'm just so fucking attractive, it'd have been cruel to deny them; But there's just one person I've found in this whole damn city that can do this to me: Make my brain turn to pink gooey mush inside my head at the slightest touch of those long, luxurious fingers; make me arch and cry out and groan with no damn control over my body; make me wanna screw right then and there just by a look in his eye, or some rare smutty little smirk pulling at the edges of his normally completely expressionless mouth. No chick had ever been able to make me feel this fucking _good_, and trust me: that's one hell of a lot of competition to beat.

Tseng's eyes glinted with amusement as he knelt back and surveyed the new addition to his bedroom decor - A stark naked redhead chained to the headboard, eyes lidded and grinning so hard it made my fucking face hurt. I shifted a little, parted my legs and arched upwards as a not-so-subtle hint of what the hell I wanted touching and when.

Ok... so I'm not great at subtle. At least, not when Tseng's around anyway.

The bastard kneeling in front of me just quirked an eyebrow inquisitively and knelt back even further, further away from my aching, twitching penis and eyed me silently for a moment. My grin faded slightly. What the hell! Why was he just sitting there staring at me? What was I? A fucking museum exhibit or something?

"...Boss?" I muttered, trying to work out what the hell he was thinking behind those stupid eyes of his. Tseng just looked at me, and then slowly licked his lips - and made my whole body shiver just at the filthy ideas running through my head.

"...Yes, Reno?" He purred calmly, that expression of indifference only slightly ruined by the fact that a kind of malicious glint seemed to be settling behind his eyes. I gulped silently, starting to wonder what the hell I'd been thinking. Maybe letting the psychotic bastard handcuff me wasn't such a great idea after all...

"Uh... ... are you gonna _do_ anything or am I just here to look pretty?"

Tseng's eyes narrowed slowly, deviously, and made me wish I hadn't opened my fat mouth. As usual. He leaned down close to my ear, his hot breath beating on my neck and just making my eyes roll back into my head with a shudder. Fuck. I'm pretty sure he must have felt it, cause I swear I could practically_ hear_ the bastard smirk.

...Not that I was gonna call him a bastard, of course. I mean come on, anybody with half a brain could tell you it's a really really bad idea to insult a Turk- We're a bunch of fucking sociopaths with loaded guns- and even though my brain wasn't exactly functioning at 100% here I still knew: insulting a Turk while you're tied to the bastard's bed? You're heading for some serious pain.

I felt strands of long, silky black hair spreading over my shoulder as he moved closer, careful not to allow me any skin-on-skin contact, and he was ready for me when I growled impatiently and tried to arch up, pulling back just enough for me to feel his body heat close to mine, making me fucking tug at the handcuffs and curse under my breath in the strain to get closer. Dammit I just wanted a little god damn contact! My member was aching, twitching for attention. My skin was tingling, sweating, just aching for that miserable asshole to touch me. Somewhere, anywhere! Trust me: I ain't a patient man, and my penis is even less patient than me, so between us it's difficult as fuck to stay in control and not just follow my dick around all damn day.

Tseng kept his lips close to my ear, breathing slowly on my neck, torturing me, making me want him more with every breath. I couldn't tell you how long we stayed like that: Tseng knelt over me, breathing deeply, keeping just out of range of my touch, and me, my back arched unnaturally upwards, too fucking nervous to speak in case I insulted him in my lustful stupor, and too damn proud to beg.

...Too damn proud so far, that is.

Tseng shifted slightly above me, his hair caressing my shoulder and chest, and then... ever so fucking gently... his lips grazed against my ear.

Now, you better understand this before I start, I have no problem with... y'know... _sensitivity_. I can make girls scream, heck sometimes even cry with pleasure before I'm finished for the night. I'm a fucking sex machine, just ask 90% of the chicks in Midgar. Reno the Sex Machine, that's me; but despite how damn good I am in bed, still... just that tiniest of touches sent my nervous system into overdrive.

"A-ah!" My fists clenched and my back arched painfully higher as Tseng's lips gave me a taster of the attention I so desperately wanted. My member gave a huge twitch and I stupidly attempted to sit up, but I was desperate. Who the fuck cared if I pulled my arms outta their sockets? I wanted Tseng to touch me. I wanted to wrap my damn legs around the bastard and feel him inside me, groaning my name. To hell with my other body parts! They could drop off for all I cared.

"Reno. Stay exactly where you are."

The words were an order, not a request and before I even realised what the hell I was doing I dropped back down onto the mattress obediently – the result of having this guy as a boss for three years - he has this tone in his voice that just makes you do exactly whatever the hell you're told, in fear of having your eyes gouged out. I tried to get a glimpse of his face, try to work out what the hell he was going to do to me next, but he leaned down next to me away from my gaze and I felt pressure against my wrists, meaning that he had just slid the handcuffs down the headboard, restricting me from trying to sit up the way I had before.

"...But then," He continued, growling lowly into my ear, an undertone of anger suddenly appearing in his voice. I gulped audibly. "You never were very good at _staying where you're told_."

... And finally... the situation hit me. The whole reason Tseng had tied me up in the first fucking place:

Tseng never forgets.

One word: Shit.


	6. Chapter 6

**Chapter 6**

Ugh. Why the hell did I agree to this again?

Tseng knelt over me, his god damn beautiful body hovering inches from me, taunting me in the way only Tseng knows how to: His hair caressing my cheek but no touch. No skin. No contact. Which is precisely what he meant to do.

I gulped again, cursing myself in my complete and total fucking stupidity. My brain is about as useful as Rude in a haircare commercial when it comes to multitasking, and being touched and seduced by Tseng had completely driven out my damn memories that he was still pissed at me.

I shifted, trying to ignore my aching cock, wondering what the hell the crazy bastard had in store for me after this. I moved my hands above my head a little and tried to get a glimpse of Tseng's face, but he just moved aside, laughing that dark laugh of his that normally accompanied him into the interrogation rooms back at Shinra Tower. Dammit! The tension was killing me here! But then, that was obviously pretty much what Tseng wanted. Without warning I suddenly felt his lips against my ear again and I shuddered, moving in towards the warmth instinctively, but before I knew it he was gone again.

But the bastard wasn't just gone. He was moving. I felt that silky smooth hair slowly trail down against my neck, my shoulder... and Tseng's dark, smoky eyes suddenly rested on mine, filled with lust, anger, and another emotion I just couldn't put my finger on. Well fuck – d'you blame me? When the head of the Turks is pissed at you – even if he is your damn lover - you have more important things to think about.

He watched me for a while, studying me the way he does from across a desk while we're at work – that look that gives you the sensation that he can just see straight through you, down to your damn bones, into your twisted little head. Something told me that talking right now wasn't gonna help the situation, so I kept my big fat useless mouth tight shut, so I couldn't really do much but look back, unable to tear my eyes away from his, my eyelids lowered lustfully and just hoping to fuck that he'd finish whatever the hell this was and let me touch his skin – that fucking flawless skin that made me melt into Reno Jelly every time I got the chance to brush past it.

Tseng's eyes glowed like coals, reflecting the nighttime lights of Midgar that glowed outside his bedroom window, and I suddenly saw his lips twitch slightly, as if he'd understood every fucking thought that had just gone through my head. He cocked an eyebrow and raised a finger – slowly, mockingly, and then lowered it carefully onto my chest, dragging it downwards across my stomach... my abdomen, watching my expression silently. My muscles twitched under his touch and before I knew it I was arching my hips again, like a fucking puppet on a string, reacting to every tiny touch, just waiting for the teasing son of a bitch to touch what I wanted him to.

...And then? The bastard stopped.

His finger just stood still... less than an inch from my dick.

I gotta admit something pretty unmanly here, because in case you hadn't noticed by now, I'm impatient as fuck – I hate waiting around for anything. Sometimes just waiting for the coffee machine to work sometimes makes me want to go all Godzilla on the thing. And waiting for the damn lift to arrive at work? Well let's just say when other people see me waiting... they know to take the stairs.

But the point I'm trying to make here is this: My patience is about as long as Rude's hair; so when I don't get what the hell I want immediately, my body decides by itself what to do... and it sure as crap never asks my permission. Which is why, with Tseng's finger less than a god damned inch from my aching cock, his eyebrow arched at me in that dark look that made my entire body just turn to goo... the next thing I heard was someone panting:

"F-fuck... Boss please... just touch me..."

It took me a few seconds to realise that had just come from me. Oh shit, had I just begged? I could feel the heat rising to my damn cheeks already, there was no way that perceptive asshole above me wouldn't notice. I turned my face away and tried to cover it with hair. Yeah Reno... real smooth... he's totally not gonna realise what you're doing.

There was a pause. A silence. I could not so much hear as _feel_ him thinking whether to give me what I wanted yet. Bastard.

"But I am touching you, Reno."

...And that would be amusement in his voice there. Dammit! Guess my punishment wasn't over yet. What the fuck was wrong with this guy? Didn't he know just how close I was to going outta my tree here? Come on Tseng... sure I'd disobeyed orders, but how the hell was that different to any other day?

I decided to try another change of tack, still hiding my cheeks just in case. I licked my lips slowly and tried to think straight – something that my fucked up little brain finds difficult even at the best of times, least of all when all the blood's flowing the opposite way. The words I decided on next stuck in my throat like broken glass.

"...Ok Tseng... y-you were right." Ugh. Someone get my ego to E.R, I just put it in critical condition. "I-I'm..." A gulp. Ah shit. I decided my throbbing member was more important right now, and besides my ego was already half dead, I may as well kill it entirely.

I winced, bracing myself as though for a punch, and finally forced myself to say my least favourite word in the whole fucking world. "... ...Sorry."

That's the trouble with having the Head of the Turks as your lover: having sex with a highly trained interrogation expert means you hardly ever win the argument.

Again, Tseng had gone silent; And Tseng going silent is rarely a good thing – it means he's thinking too damn much, plotting something. My ego was way too fucking bruised to look the asshole in the eye right now, which is why what happened next was so damn unexpected, it nearly made me shoot my load right then and there.

Hot, wet warmth suddenly wrapped around almost all of my touch-starved cock without warning. A hand suddenly slid underneath me and was massaging my balls with an expert's touch. All I could do was arch up and cry out in surprise, my cock twitching violently at finally getting a little attention, before I actually fucking realised what the hell was happening... and then it twitched even harder.

When I finally had the self control to look down, it took stupid Reno here a few seconds to make sense of what the hell I was seeing. Fucking beautiful black hair fanned out across my hips like a waterfall, half covering those brain-meltingly hot Wutaian eyes, fixed on me as they moved, and that set of lips that just looked half-mocking, half-seductive as they slid up and down my member.

Tseng, head of the Turks, was sucking me off.

If I had the brain power left to be surprised I would have been, but right now my brain capacity was more on par with a drunken chimpanzee, so all I could do was stare back into Tseng's dark eyes lustfully, needfully, panting, groaning as the sadistic asshole below me started sucking slowly, flicking his tongue out against the underside of my dick, making me gasp and clench my fists above my head, just wishing I could get free and wrap my hands in that damn perfect hair.

Three months ago this shit was the stuff of fantasy – something I'd think about when I was bored at work – y'know, when I had nothing better to do but paperwork. Now my boss was kneeling at the end of my bed, his eyes fixed on mine, my dick in his mouth and fuck... but this was better than any stupid fantasy.

I muttered his name as my eyes rolled back into my head, my hips attempting to jerk up into that perfect mouth, but by now Tseng had placed a hand across my hips to stop me, his other hand still teasing my balls. He just let his lip twitch around my leaking cock in what could have been a smirk and took me in deeper, after three months of practice knowing just exactly what to touch... what to do to make me feel good.

I couldn't even think any more, couldn't even remember my own damn name. All I knew was that it felt so fucking good, and that my muscles were twitching as though I was about to have some kind of sex-induced seizure. My member felt as though I was already close, even though Tseng had hardly picked up the pace. All that damn teasing had just sent my senses into overdrive. I could feel my dick twitching inside Tseng's hot mouth, could feel him licking away the precum and I screwed my eyes shut, finally breaking eye contact as the warm aching sensation swelled up inside me. I could feel the sweat dripping off me by the bucket as one last time I forced my vocal chords to form a sentence, trying desperately to hold off until I'd spoken.

"Ahh... Tseng... I-I'm gonna-"

But the thing is... I didn't.

As soon as Tseng had heard me speak he'd pulled away, squeezing the base of my member to stop me reaching orgasm.

Shit. I guess Tseng wasn't done with me after all.

I'd practically lost my voice through groaning by this point, but I still managed to whimper, tears forming in the corners of my eyes through sheer frustration, arching my back, writhing and feeling as though I was about to go out of my tree with lust. Dammit, I'd already said fucking sorry! What more did the crazy bastard want?

My member was throbbing so hard it hurt. Nobody had ever teased me this much before. Mostly because I'd never let them, but my body just wasn't used to it. For me, sex had always been 'Pants off, do what you gotta do, get dressed, gone', but with Tseng it was different. Even when he wasn't teasing me to the point where I thought my brain might just goddamn implode, the actual orgasm wasn't that important to me anymore. It was being close to the guy, smelling that Tseng smell that only belonged to him, having the privilege of being able to touch that dark, Wutaian skin without him snapping off my arm for it.

Crap I sound like a girl for admitting this, but...

It was the intimacy.

"Reno." Tseng mumbled, his voice a mixture of lust, anger and amusement. Me? I was way too distracted by the fact my penis felt like it was about to explode like a rocket, and who the hell could concentrate on speech at a time like that?

Tseng waited for a moment, his fingers still clamped around my dick, determined not to let me cum.

"_Reno_."

He said it a little more forcefully this time, apparently losing his patience. Geez. Well 'scuse me boss, sorry for being distracted by the fucking space shuttle in my crotch.

I frowned, trying to remember how to speak. Eventually I just gave up and went with a grunt, still writhing, precum slipping down over his fingers and over my inner thighs. Personally, I thought it was a fucking miracle I was still conscious, let alone speaking.

There was a ruffling of sheets as Tseng leaned up and into my ear once more, breathing against my neck. My hips jerked and he let out a sadistic chuckle. Bastard. If I wasn't in love with him, I'd've killed the psycho by now.

"Reno, I need to know you're going to obey orders from now on." He purred into my ear, but even as fucked in the head as I was I could recognise the seriousness in his voice; the concern that – if it had been anyone but me – would've gone unnoticed. Despite my not-so-sober mental state right now, I could still tell that this was what the whole thing was about. Tseng was trying to look out for me... the only way he knew would get through to me.

I gulped. Tseng took a breath and released his grip on my member, apparently knowing that I wouldn't spontaneously explode any more. I panted and turned my face away. Come on, Tseng! Now isn't the time for this crap! Apparently though, Tseng was taking full advantage of the fact I couldn't get away from him. Dammit! I had no choice but to listen. Somehow, I didn't think pretending to be asleep would be too believable this time

"You nearly died today because of your stubbornness and impatience. You acted like an imbecile. You're better than that." Anger. Tseng's voice got a little louder and he backed off, moving his position to straddle me, apparently so I couldn't move around and would concentrate on him instead. I peered an eye open nervously and looked at him, glaring at me like he was ready to rip my own damn limbs off and feed them to me if I did something wrong. "You know you're better than that."

Bullshit. Not that I said that out loud, of course. I quite liked my body parts where they were.

Gladly Tseng wasn't looking for an answer. Instead he leaned up above my head and started messing with something out of my line of sight, and started speaking again.

"You'd sure as hell better start taking orders from now on, Reno, or I'll find out if there are any vacancies on our floor for a janitor."

There was a dangerous growl in his deep, Wutaian voice now and I knew he wasn't joking. Just to hedge my bets and make sure all my limbs stayed attached for a while longer, I gulped and nodded in agreement. 

...Well come on, d'you blame me? When Tseng's this angry it's best just to do what he says and hope he doesn't just rip your balls off and choke you with them.

Apparently the nod was enough for him. He sighed in frustration but the glare softened a little. I heard a click above my head and finally realised he'd been messing with the handcuffs – he'd just let me go.

Apparently my lesson was over.

Fucking finally I could touch him, and like the whipped little ass I am that's exactly what I did do: sitting up as fast as I could with my over-exerted muscles, trailing my fingers over every inch of him I could get my damn hands on, leaning forwards and kissing the hell out of him needfully. My member was throbbing like a Mako reactor on overload, and no matter what he'd just said, I was betting he wanted this as much as me.

Tseng kissed back just as needfully, letting loose a low purr of a moan into my mouth as he wrapped his hands in my now scarecrow-like hair. Like I gave a crap though. After all the hassle and nearly being shot tonight, I could look like shit ran over twice for all I cared, right now all I wanted was for Tseng to get the hell inside me and finish what he'd started. With that thought in mind, my legs instinctively started to part, giving yet another oh-so-subtle, renoish hint of what I wanted, but yet again, Tseng had other Ideas.

A long Wutaian hand grabbed my leg, and even without breaking the kiss, the confusing bastard in my lap forced my legs shut again.

I frowned. What the hell? Did he think this aching boner was just gonna go away by itself or something? Determined to get my own way I tried again... but I was made for speed, not strength, and Tseng simply overpowered me and kept my legs exactly where they were.

This was... fucking infuriating. I was desperate here! How long was he going to drag this shit out for? Until I finally cracked and ended up needing a rubber room? Because the way things were going that was gonna be any moment now.

Tseng's fingers trailed across my back and round to my chest, sliding over a nipple and sending shockwaves down my back before he moved a single hand up towards mine, interlacing our fingers before pulling away from the kiss with a pant. I was on the edge of calling him every name in my vocabulary for how fucking teasing this was, when I saw what he was doing with my hand.

Two of my fingers were now laying against his lips as a faint smile appeared on them momentarily. I blinked, confused.

Have you ever had one of those erotic dreams? One that seemed so damn real that when you woke up you couldn't figure out whether it had really happened? I have those a lot. Nearly every damn night actually: my sex drive runs 24 hours a day, 7 days a week, and I've got no control over it whatsoever. My dreams used to be about girls – chicks, sometimes more than one, in my bed and... well... you get the picture. These days it was Tseng who took main role in my dreams, and what he said next made me wonder whether I was actually asleep.

"Reno," He purred, lips brushing the tips of my fingers, his eyes leveled on mine lustfully, "...I want to ride you."


	7. Chapter 7

Note: Yes, I'm back. The prodigal daughter has returned. All I can do is say sorry for leaving this update so long, but this summer should see a lot more chapters arrive. After such a long absence, I'm trying hard to get back into Reno's state of mind, so if this chapter has its flaws, bear with me.

As always, reviews are always welcome.

Chapter 7

Was I dreaming? Was this whole damn thing just a figment of my imagination? I stared like a dumbass, my mouth slightly open as Tseng took my fingers into his mouth, that hot, sticky warmth wrapping around my skin; that fucking beautiful gaze on his dark face, telling me that he was deadly serious.

In case you haven't guessed by now, my subconscious is a bastard, and it loves fucking me around. I was beginning to wonder if I wasn't gonna suddenly wake up slumped across my desk, paperwork waiting for me, and a fully-dressed and pissed of Tseng standing in the doorway threatening to eat my liver with some fava beans and a nice chianti.

"Fuck!" Tseng nipped hard at my fingers, smirking psychoticly at my discomfort. Ok, not a dream then. I glared in a half-assed way and muttered some kind of drawled insult under my breath. By this point though, all I cared about was where those fingers were headed. I tried to pull them away and downwards, expecting any second to be growled at and my hand guided back towards his mouth. Apparently I wasn't the only one who was desperate now, though. The only thing he did was kneel up, his dark eyes glazed with lust and his hands tugging at my hair. Let me tell ya, seeing the Head of the Turks staring at you like that is one fuck of a powerful motivator.

I didn't bother with teasing him, I'm nowhere near as patient as the guy sitting in my lap, and as much of an ass as I wanted to be, I was pretty sure I would have exploded if I waited much longer. I lunged forward and kissed him hard, desperately, like a fat chick at an all-you-can-eat buffet. I could still taste me in his mouth and without a warning, I slid my fingers past the ring of muscles and inside him.

Tseng tensed. He tugged my hair so hard I was almost sure he was gonna rip the fucker out, but I really didn't give a shit. This was my fantasy. This was like going to pornographic heaven. I didn't care if I ended up like Rude - bald as a baby's ass. Tseng was sitting over me, groaning into my mouth, shuddering, as I slid my fingers inside him. His member twitched hard against my stomach as I stretched him, and he rocked backwards, giving in at fucking last to the lust. He'd finally cracked. He groaned what sounded like my name as I slid a finger over his prostate, but to be honest it could have been anything, since his tongue was in my mouth at the time.

Fuck this, it was taking too long. I pulled my fingers out suddenly and he gasped, pulling away from the kiss to catch his breath. All I could do was smirk stupidly. I've never used this word to describe anyone else (well okay - maybe to get a chick into bed, but not when I really meant it), but seeing Tseng sitting over me, breathing hard, rocking on his knees at the sudden loss of sensation, holy hell - he was fucking beautiful.

He removed his hands from my hair and slid them down my neck towards my chest, his nails digging in to the skin and making my muscles twitch. I grabbed his hips greedily, dragging him down towards my aching cock. Neither of us could speak, even if we wanted to. The lust had sent us straight into instinct mode. He nodded - the only communication he could manage, and the next moment he was sliding down onto me, his normally emotionless face contorted into the kind of expression I'd only ever imagined in my craziest, alcohol-fuelled fantasies.

I could hardly even breathe. Tseng's insides were hot, and so fucking tight it was almost painful. My dick was twitching, itching for me to start thrusting up into him like a rabid dog in heat. I gritted my teeth, squeezing my eyes shut in concentration. Tseng had never agreed to go bottom before, and at the back of my head I knew that unless I wanted never to get to do this again, I had to wait for him to get used to me. It was also lurking there somewhere at the back of my head that this must be his first time completely. Right now, my brain was too busy trying to control my dick to process this stuff. Screw it, I'd process that bombshell later.

Tseng began to relax a little, his fingertips clutching my chest instead of scratching me to pieces. He slowly lowered himself further down, pushing against me. It was as though he wanted me as deep inside him as possible. Well, the feeling was mutual. I raised my hips full off the bed, pushing his hips down so hard I was pretty sure I was gonna bruise the bastard. He never objected, and just as I was sure I couldn't hold off much longer, he slammed his hips downwards with a deep cry.

My eyes clenched shut so hard I felt as though they were gonna implode. I nearly broke my goddamned teeth as I gritted them at the sudden surge of pleasure in the pit of my stomach. I couldn't hold off any longer: I grabbed Tseng's hips roughly and started thrusting upwards, growling like a fucking Behemoth as Tseng moaned, reacting to my thrusts and trying to take control of the rhythm. There was no way I was gonna let him, though. For once, I was in control, and if there's one thing I'm good at, it's being a God in the sack. Well, I've never had any complaints anyway...

Tseng tensed again for a second, I guess unsure whether to let me have my wicked way or smack me upside the head. Being the devious son of a bitch I am, I decided to distract him: taking a shaking hand from his hip, I pulled him forwards and lowered my face to his neck, breathing in that addictive smell before latching my lips onto his pulse point.

My stomach jumped when, after a second, he simply tilted his neck with a gasp, that long black hair laying on my shoulder. He let go of my chest completely, wrapping his arms around my back instead as I thrust hard into the tight, warm, twitching muscles. Before I knew what had happened, he was responding to my thrusts, no longer trying to set the pace; to take control. Holy crap, but he gave in completely, allowing me to angle his hips any way I wanted, to bite down on his neck. I was now thrusting as hard as I could, trying to force myself deeper every time; trying to hit that one spot that he always found on me - that would make him react.

A second later I found it. And fuck, was it worth it.

Tseng arched. And not just a little. His entire body snapped backwards, like a Zolom rearing up to attack. Crap, but for a second my stupid little brain thought he had snapped in two. His hair flew back and he cried out, without even the smallest amount of that Tseng-like control he normally had. His chest shuddered, and his muscles spazmed around me. That was it, I was completely lost. This guy drove me to the fucking edge of insanity at the best of times, but right now...

I sat up, kissing the son of a bitch so hard it was bruising, and the next moment we'd flipped completely over: Tseng underneath me, arching back into the bed with his eyes screwed shut in pleasure, his legs wrapped up around my back, pulling me into him. That old familiar warm feeling was spreading through my stomach now, and I grabbed his member, pumping him as best I could in time to the rhythm. Hey, nobody can say I ain't a considerate lover. Well, maybe a few drunken one night stands, but that's another story...

It was a few more seconds before I felt Tseng's body start to shudder. He shouted, his hips jolting upwards into me, and the next moment he was gasping for breath, sticky warm liquid spreading between us and dripping down over the sheets.

The expression on his face was the thing that pushed me over the edge. I buried my face in his shoulder, clutching at him as I came. Hard. Hell, any harder and I think my dick would have dropped off. I tried to muffle my stupid noises in his shoulder, but I'm noisy at the best of times, and you can bet your ass half of Midgar heard me.

Most people remember their first time better than anything. Me? I've laid so many girls that it kinda all bleeds together after a while. Nah, the sensation that will stick with me until I get a bullet in the chest is this: the best fucking orgasm of my life.

I have no idea how long it lasted, my brain was total mush. But by the time I finished the bed was more like a waterbed, and Tseng had recovered just enough energy to be staring up at me with equal parts tired amusement and affection. If I'd had enough energy left to blush, my face would have probably matched my hair.

I collapsed. And I mean completely. My entire body gave up any attempts to work and my entire body weight landed on the guy beneath me. This is one of the times when it's probably a good thing I wasn't built like Rude. Still completely devoid of the ability to speak, I settled on the bastard's chest, listening to my heart thundering in my ears through the exertion.

From the tiny, insignificant part of my brain that was still trying to function, there was a warning coming. Three months ago, this confusing asshole had been hot and cold like my crappy shower. One minute he'd been all over me (okay, so maybe a near-death experience had nudged him along, but still), and the next minute he'd been looking at me like something stuck to his Shinra-issue boot. It had taken a full bottle of whiskey, a butt-naked Reno, and a life threatening wound to get the reason why. Stubborn bastard. The point was, that Tseng wasn't used to letting people get that close. Right now, after doing something that needed so much trust from the guy, I was getting ready for him to throw me off and ask me to leave. It came as a hell of a shock, then, when he lowered his legs and wrapped his arms around my back, apparently not giving a shit that I'd just destroyed his bed.

My eyes lidded, like a cat, and I was pretty happy to just lie there being petted. I can't help it if I like attention, can I? He trailed his fingers down my back absently, letting me lie there for a moment while the feeling returned to my limbs. My chest was covered in scratches, my legs started to ache, even my fingers and lips felt bruised, but fuck was it worth it.

After a moment I managed to move my head to look up at him, meeting his look of amusement with a smutty, lazy grin. He rolled his eyes and shoved me off without a word, pushing me to the other side of the bed. Gee, thanks, Tseng. Glad to know you've got some fucking manners.

A second later, he was replacing the handcuffs in the drawer they came from and pulling something else out. Something in a glass bottle, that was almost as good as what we'd just done.

"You look like you could use a pick-me-up." He said mockingly, twitching his eyebrow upwards as he passed me the bottle. Like I gave a crap about how I looked right now. I was still high off my face on afterglow. Grinning like a moron, covered in sweat (and other body fluids), hair matted and a face probably still covered in soot from the explosion, I took as many long swigs from Tseng's expensive whiskey before he snatched it back off me with a playful glare, and pouring some into a nearby glass for himself.

"Reno." He said after a moment, placing the bottle back in the drawer. I tensed. That was his serious voice again. What, was he gonna kick me out now? I wouldn't be surprised.

"Reno, I hope you realise that what I said was serious."

"What, that you wanted to ride me?"

Oh shit. I knew before the sentence had finished that it was definitely the wrong thing to say, but my brain and my mouth like conspiring to make me look like a prick. Tseng stood up, walking away towards the window, his back to me.

"You can use the shower." He growled dangerously, those godawful clipped tones. "I'm not having you sleeping here if you stink."

It was the voice he used at work, the one that meant I'd been dismissed, and it made my stomach sink. The thing was that I'd gotten too close. This wasn't fucking work, and we both knew it. I stumbled to my feet and opened my mouth again, pressing my luck.

"You mean the stuff about taking orders?"

There was a brief silence. I was pretty sure he was wondering whether to respond, or to snap my head off my shoulders. Ok, so I was being a douchebag, and this was serious stuff, but I wasn't gonna be dismissed like that. I had enough of that shit in the office every day.

He sighed. "Yes, Reno. The stuff about taking orders."

"Yeah... I knew you were serious."

"Good." He placed the now empty glass on the windowsill and turned towards me, still completely naked. I had trouble keeping my eyes above waist level, let me tell you; but I figured annoying him was probably not the best thing to do right now. He walked over and his eyes softened slightly. "Because I can't afford to lose you."

I felt something in my chest jump at those damn words, and for once I had nothing to say. Tseng's expression changed again almost immediately though, and he walked over to the wardrobe to grab a towel. "You're the best Turk I've got. If you get yourself killed, I'll have to train somebody all over again." He threw the towel to me.

"Uh... thanks, boss."

"Now hurry up and get yourself clean. I'm not having you walk into the Tower tomorrow looking like that." He turned away from me again, and I made my way to the bathroom, still trying to figure out what exactly the hell had happened tonight, and whether Tseng had - in his own fucked up way - just said to me what I thought he'd said.


	8. Chapter 8

Chapter 8

I'd been a Turk for two and a half years now. Two and a half years of shootouts, bullet wounds, severed body parts and explosions, and you know what? I still couldn't get used to this crap: sitting behind a desk like a good little Shinra worker, writing reports about the people I'd just killed.

I sighed and rubbed my head, wondering what the hell I was meant to be writing again. This was not what I wanted to be thinking about right now. What I wanted to be thinking about was the events of last night. Nearly being shot in the damn head aside, it was probably the best night of my crappy little life.

Not that there's really much competition for that wonderful award. Up until a few months ago, my life consisted of drinking myself into a stupor - alone or with the bald bastard in the next office, getting my face ripped open, or just being a miserable fuck. Let's be honest here: a Turk ain't meant to have a happy or long life, but as far as histories go, I'd say my life story would score at least a 9.2 on the Crapometer. I still have trouble realising that it was the bastard who made my working life a living hell that turned it all around.

But I'm getting sappy here. The point is, when I signed up for this shit nobody mentioned that I'd have to write about the crap I did. I figured I had an easy ride up from the Slums. All I had to do was blow some stuff up, walk around like I owned the place, and get paid for it. This was not what I had in mind. Lying bastards.

The blank paper stared up at me, but I didn't see the paper. My head was half way across the Plate, in an apartment block. I was helping Tseng change the bedsheets, me grinning like a dick at the mess we'd made, while Tseng looked at me with pure goddamn amusement. We were sitting on the bed, me sprawled out shamelessly butt naked, while Tseng tried his hardest not to look, pretending to read a book instead...

Heh... I'll let you guess how that one ended.

The familiar, angry click of a door down the hall made me sit up like a lightning bolt. I know that sound too damn well, and you can bet your ass it don't mean anything good. I looked around, making sure that there was nothing painfully obvious to scold me for today, and rested my arms across the blank page in a pathetic attempt to hide the lack of work I'd been doing.

My door swung open. No fucking surprise. I looked up, trying to force an expression of innocence on my normally guilty-as-hell face. It had never worked, but hey, I could still try.

Tseng stepped in, back to his old, stick-up-the-ass self, hands folded behind his back as he glared around the room, looking for something to pick on. I tried to smile innocently. It made my face ache.

"What can I do ya for, Tseng?"

I stopped the grin threatening to spread across my face just in time. I guess I could have worded that better, but the look on his face was worth the risk. He glowered at me, eyes narrowed to slits, and I felt a swell of good old fashioned evil glee rising in my chest. Ok, I admit it: I kinda get off on the rush of pissing the guy off, but if it was a choice between possible decapitation and paperwork, hell, I'd choose decapitation any day.

"Your emails, Reno."

I blinked stupidly. What had I done now? I remembered trying to apply to Heidigger for maternity leave a couple of months back, but Tseng had already torn me a new one for that. My brain goes into automatic when I get accused of something. Generally, when someone accuses me of something I'm probably guilty, so before I knew what I was saying, My fat mouth opened and I heard my voice saying the words. Those fucking fatal words.

"I didn't do it!"

Wow. I mean really. After a whole damn life of lying, cheating and screwing around, you woulda thought I could come up with something better than that. It was about as believable as Scarlet's virginity.

Tseng just continued to glare at me like a dog that had taken a dump in his shoe. The corner of his eye twitched dangerously. I leaned further forwards, trying to hide my non-report better.

"Your emails," He snapped after a pause, "should be read at the beginning and end of every shift."

Wait... this is what he was nagging me about? I tried not to roll my eyes like a damn schoolkid and shrugged.

"Yeah yeah, I know the drill, Tseng. I read them already." Another big fat stinking lie, and a fucking bad one at that. You know, I used to think I was a pretty good gambler? Then I met this son of a bitch, and somehow he always wins.

"Really?" Came the reply, in that slow, dangerous tone. He quirked an eyebrow at me and smoothed the lapel of his jacket, cooly. "Then perhaps you can tell me why you're not currently downstairs in the boardroom?"

Crap. I tried to scratch around my imagination for an excuse that would work, while Tseng stood in the doorway calmly, with just the slightest hint of amusement behind the disapproving glare. Fuck, I swear Tseng just likes seeing me squirm, the twisted bastard. Maybe this was what passed as worktime entertainment in his sick little mind. Then again, that was pretty much what his idea of entertainment was outside of work, too.

"I..." Come on, Reno, think of something. My eyes landed on the blank paper in front of me. "I was uh, just getting some more of last night's report done." I stood up, grabbing my jacket and slinging it over my shoulder, careful to avoid letting Tseng get a glimpse of the blank paper. I smiled, in what I was hoping was a charming way, but was more than likely just another cheezy grin. "You know me, boss. Once I get into my work, I kinda lose track of time."

Why do I do this? You know, I sometimes wonder if I'm completely suicidal and I just don't know it yet. If I'd admitted to not reading my emails, I'd've probably just ended up with a slap on the hand and another boring-ass lecture. Instead I was steadily digging myself a huge fucking hole for Tseng to bury me in. I can't help it though: in-work Tseng makes me equal parts excited, and jumpy as hell.

I headed for the door, and Tseng turned to walk away. Just for a second - the tiniest goddamn fraction of a second, his smooth, warm hand brushed against mine. It was enough to make me lid my eyes a little, and memories of last night came flashing back into my head - like those flashing neon lights all over Honeybee - pretty damn difficult to ignore. Tseng cleared his throat as he strode towards the elevator. I wondered if the same thing was going through his irritating brain, too.

We stepped into the elevator together, and Tseng pressed the button to head downwards. The doors closed, and then? Silence.

I can't even tell you what my fucked up little mind was thinking, then. But then, it doesn't matter where the hell I am, my subconscious always finds a way of turning the scenario into a porno. I smirked to myself, leaning back against the railings. I could practically hear the cheesy, synthesised music starting up in the background; Me saying somethin' like 'oh no, the lift broke down'...

Tseng turned his head and looked me up and down with an air of irritation. "Button your shirt up correctly, Reno."

I blinked stupidly for a second, then stood up and fumbled under the creases in my shirt to find the buttons. Maybe the broken down lift wasn't such a good idea after all.

Finally the lift juddered and screeched to a halt. Instinctively we both fell into step, prowling out like a pair of badass, psychotic panthers. Just because I was a lazy, slovenly asshole up on floor 69 didn't mean I wasn't professional sometimes, and this was one of those times. I had no idea what the hell we were heading here for, but whatever was goin' on in the boardroom across the hall was probably important. Tseng's expression did a 180 degree flip. From looking at me like piece of crap back in the lift, there was something else in his dark, way-too-serious eyes that looked a hell of a lot like pride.

Professionalism - Tseng's version of Heroin.

Rude was waiting for us outside the doors like a good little lackey. He gave me a brief nod and a grunt, which I interpreted as 'Morning Reno, how are you?', and then fell into step with us as Tseng opened the door.

The sound of voices rose up as the huge wooden doors creaked open.

If it had been my first time in this room, it mighta been impressive, but I've seen the place so many damn times that I pretty much zone out. Bigass columns along the walls; a table so damn long and wide I sometimes wonder how the hell they got it up here, and my favourite part: A huge window at the far end, behind the seat at the head of the table showed almost the whole damn plate. If it weren't for the chimneys, neon lights, and pollution so thick you could swim in it, it probably coulda passed as beautiful. Believe me, that view had gotten me laid more times than my alcohol-damaged brain can remember. And the table? Well, let's just say I probably know every single inch of it by now. Shame Tseng never agreed to study it with me.

The sun was struggling through the window, past the smog and huge clouds of snot coloured pollution. The table was completely full. Oh great, this could only mean one damn thing: A full staff meeting.

The muttering stopped as we walked into the room and everyone turned to look, like one of Hojo's freaky, slime-covered experiments had just crawled in. Tseng ignored the reaction and walked straight towards the three empty chairs that had been left - way at the end of the table, as far away from everyone else as possible. Not that I expected any different. We're Turks: the black sheep; the scumbags. We're like that alcoholic uncle that never gets invited anywhere: Nobody comes near us or even fucking mentions us unless they need to.

"Tseng." said a voice, gruffly. "Take a seat."

President Shinra sat at the head of the table, his stomach bulging over the edge like some mutant jello pudding. Well, if I was hungry before, I sure as hell wasn't now. Tseng nodded professionally, then lowered himself formally into his chair.

Ugh. I was bored already. Why the hell did I have to come to this? They could at least make everyone where party hats or something, make it more interesting. Me and Rude sat down next to each other, and I felt him lean in to my ear.

"20 gil says Heidigger falls asleep before Scarlet this time." He grunted lowly. I smirked and lounged back in the chair.

"Make it 40 gil and you got yourself a bet."

Tseng cleared his throat loudly, and we both shut up.

It was then that I noticed something that made me feel like my stomach was full of ten ton bricks.

What I noticed was a white suit. A bright. Fucking. White. Suit.

Rufus Shinra. Fuck.

My fists clenched. The son of a bitch was sitting there, almost directly opposite, lounging backwards on his chair with that pretty-boy hair and those psycho blue eyes. And he was staring straight at me. I gritted my teeth, trying my damn hardest not to fuck up; to stand my ground and not just run the fuck out of there like a pansy. A shiver crept down my back.

_Fuck, Reno. Don't let him know._

Three months ago, my life had pretty much hit the bottom of the shit pile. Every single one of my worst goddamn nightmares had come to life, all in the space of a week. If there's any kind of god up there, I must have fucked him off royally to deserve that shit.

The sick, psychotic son of a whore, sitting opposite me, staring at me with that disgusted, venomous look in his eyes, was where it all began. Believe me, I ain't got any intention of sharing that story again, it was bad enough it happened; but lets just say that by the time he was done with me I'd nearly been killed twice, and going anywhere near that office of his brought back memories that made me feel like I was gonna hurl my lunch all over the floor.

So, being stuck in here with the bastard? Not my idea of a fun ride. In fact, I'd rather have taken up the job of licking clean Heidigger's toilet than be sitting here right now. Hell, I'd even have offered to do Palmer's for free.

I felt Tseng move at the side of me. I felt a warm Wutaian hand brush past mine under the table. Whether by accident, or for some other reason, I really couldn't tell ya.

But it seemed to help. A little. At least, I didn't run screaming from the room, or make a kamikazee jump out of that window. The next hour passed with me doing my damndest to avoid any kind of eye contact with the piece of scum across the table. I could feel his fucking eyes on me, burning in to me, the same way they had that night in the hospital floor. What the hell else was I supposed to do? Look at him? Smile and wave? So maybe I am a chicken, but if you were in my position, what the hell would you have done?

Three months ago, Tseng had given me some advice - keep my head down, do my work, be a good little boy; In other words: don't give the bastard an excuse. It had pretty much worked, and passing him in the corridor was starting to bother me less and less every time. But being stuck here, with his eyes right on me? I felt pathetic.

I mean the guy was younger than me, and I know for a fact that if it ever came down to an even fight, I'd kick the piece of shit from here to Nibelheim without even breaking a sweat. The trouble was, he was Shinra's son. Daddy's little rich boy. He could snap his fucking fingers and send me right back to the gutter where I came from. There was only one thing stopping the bastard from doing it, and that thing was the stoic, work-obsessed Wutaian sitting next to me.

After an hour, Rude distracted me with more bad news. He let out a snort and nudged me in the ribs. I turned and glared, then saw he was grinning gormlessly at something further down the table.

Heidigger was sitting with his eyes closed, his head on his chest, and drool dangling from his beard, forming a congealed pool of phlegm on the table.

Nice. Ladies and gentlemen: Our boss. And he'd just cost me 40 gil.

Fuck it, there went my drinking money.

"I believe that will be all. I hope you all understand what it is I expect you to do."

Chairs screeched. Scarlet adjusted her cleavage and stood up. Palmer struggled to get his fat ass out of the chair, and Heidigger jumped awake with a yell, then tried to pretend he'd been awake the whole time, and started telling President Shinra how much he'd enjoyed it.

I, however, made a bee line for the door. Trying to get the hell out of there and back to my paperwork. Anything had to be more comfortable than what I'd experienced. Putting my dick in a _blender_ would've been more comfortable. I didn't dare to look around, but if that prickling feeling was anything to go by, Rufus was watching me intently as I nudged my way through the door, across the hall, and into a lift. I didn't even wait for Tseng and Rude.

It was only when the doors closed that I finally screwed my eyes shut and punched the steel wall, about breaking my damn hand in the process.

After the best night of my life, why the hell did Rufus son-of-a-bastard have to fuck everything up? What the hell was I being punished for? Had I pushed old ladies off cliffs in a former life or something?

Rufus was a bottom-feeder. As a rich daddy's boy, he could've hired all the whores in honeybee (at least,, that's what I would have done), but he didn't want that. What did he want instead?

Me, that's fucking what. He liked force, pain, begging. He liked knowing he was in control. All I had to do was make one tiny slip - one sign of weakness to let him know he still had some power.

I checked my reflection in the glass window of the elevator. The whole of Midgar receded downwards as I headed up, the sound of the elevator humming in my ears.

I'd gone white. Uh... Whit_er_

Fuck. Guess I needed to work on my Poker face, huh?


	9. Chapter 9

Chapter 9

Back in my office, the first damn thing I did was light up a cigarette and reach to the underside of my desk. I might be stupid at the best of times, but occasionally I can be such a sly son of a bitch that I surprise even myself. I felt the bulge of the canteen stuck to the underside of the desk and ripped it off, electrical tape and all. I needed some damn fresh air, and something to calm my nerves. I took a deep gulp from the canteen and felt that old familiar burning in my throat. I sighed and closed my eyes. I thought I was over this shit, but then being used like a disposable sex toy wasn't something too easily forgotten.

Before I knew it, half the damn canteen had gone. I swore under my breath and stubbed my cigarette out on the desk absently, once again staring down at that blank piece of paper only this time it wasn't last night going through my head.

Fuck this, I needed to take my mind of it. I could always go see Tseng? But knowing him he'd probably take the opportunity to tie me to the chair and give me a lecture. I could nurse my pride by heading down to the canteen and flirting with the waitresses, but I really wasn't in the mood. There was only one thing for it.

I sighed forcefully, stuck the canteen back in it's totally ingenious hiding spot and dumped my jacket back on, swaying just a little. Pulling a 50 gil note out of my pocket, I decided I'd better settle up my bet with the walking bowling-ball next door. If I didn't pay up, he'd probably break my fingers, and I kinda like my fingers the way they are.

"There." I slammed the note down on Rude's desk a little too forcefully. He just stared at me, that stupid, blank look, made even more stupid by the sunglasses permanently glued to his face. "And you better get me a fucking drink outta that tonight, you robbing son of a bitch."

Rude grunted in that non-commital way and slid his hand across the desk, taking the note and sliding it into his pocket, staring at me as if daring me to try snatching it back. I stood there and raised an eyebrow expectantly. After a second he smirked evilly.

"Got no change."

"Bullshit."

"Prove it."

"Fuck you."

Rude snorted in what passed for a laugh, but what really sounded more like a pig having an epileptic fit. I hitched myself up onto the desk, shoving his half-written report to make space.

"So the boss didn't kill you?"

Huh? I blinked for a second, confused. What the hell was he talking about now?

"Last night. You fucked up."

Oh yeah, thanks for reminding me of that little screw up Rude. What are friends for?

"Guess he's thinkin' how to kill me and make it look like an accident." I lied. Well what was I supposed to say? Tell him Tseng tied me to a bed and had his wicked way with me? Fuck no. Rude was about as straight as you could get in a crooked town like this, and he was the only friend I really had up here. As much as I hate to admit it, I couldn't afford to lose the bald, stupid son of a bitch. Besides, even if he didn't care if I was banging the boss, I couldn't trust him to keep his fat mouth shut.

"Maybe you should do what you're told."

"Yeah? Well maybe you should buy a toupee."

I jumped off the desk just in time to avoid having my kneecap smashed by a fist the size of a brick. I grinned - a real grin this time. Trading insults with Rude is in my 'Top 10 ways to not go batshit insane during work hours' list, and it was really taking my mind of the shit this morning. It's also what passes for affection in our fucked up little friendship.

Yeah, other people say it with flowers; me and Rude like to say it with abuse.

Rude made to get up out of his chair for a second, but then thought better of it. I just smirked, knowing exactly what he was thinking. I might not be as strong as that asshole, but when I wanted to be, I was fast as a rat out of a damn sewer.

"Get your pasty ass back here."

"Hey, get your mind off my ass, Rude. I ain't into that." Well, not with him anyway. That idea was enough to land me in a rubber room.

He snorted in revulsion and grabbed his paperwork from across the desk, turning to it with that look of concentration that put me in mind of a constipated bulldog. I took that as an end to the hostilities, and suddenly feeling way better, I made for the door.

"You gonna be at the bar, tonight?" I asked, looking over my shoulder. He grunted in assent.

"Not carrying you home again, though."

I didn't reply to that. He said that every damn time we went out, and he never followed through. The great thing about Rude was that although he could crush your damn skull with one hand, at heart he was a soft bastard. I'd gotten so drunk that I couldn't remember my own name. Once I'd even proposed to a fucking lamp post, and not once had he left me in the street, in a pool of my own vomit.

Now that's real friendship.

I closed the door behind me and slunk down the hallway towards the coffee machine, pretty much back to my old self again, and decided that it would probably be a good idea to grab a coffee and get what was left of the whiskey outta my system. The last thing I needed was Tseng smelling booze on my breath. As I stood there, waiting for the coffee machine to decide it wanted to work, I realised that Tseng's office door was ajar. I frowned.

Even on the hottest days of the Summer (and thanks to the permanent clouds of pollution, Midgar was like an oven on full blast) Tseng was such a secretive bastard that he'd rather roast like a chicken than let his door stay open. This couldn't be good.

I dared to peer through the door. The room was empty, the only thing I could hear was the coffee machine beside me making painful screeches as it tried to remember what its job was. I'd never seen that office without Tseng in it, it was like seeing Rocket Town without the rocket, or Palmer without a cream cake in his fat mouth. It seemed... wrong. Forgetting the coffee completely, I pulled open the door and walked in, peering in the corners as if expecting Tseng to jump out and eat me whole.

Tseng's office was just the way you'd expect it to be: Ordered. Piles of paperwork sat on his desk, perfectly aligned as though he'd taken a damn tape measure and set square to them. A pen holder sat in pride of place at the front of the desk with some expensive looking silver pens sitting in it, and right at the front, aligned perfectly with the edge of the desk, sat a plaque.

'Tseng R., Head of Turks: Special Operations.'

There was something out of place, though: one file was sitting on the desk out of place, like he'd been reading it before he'd left. And, being the nosy son of a bitch that I am, I opened it.

The picture of a girl stared up at me. She looked about 16, with long brown hair tied up with a pink ribbon. She was staring into the camera with a huge smile on her face, and just underneath were just two lines, written in Tseng's way-too-perfect handwriting.

'_A. Gainsboro. Highest priority. Regular surveilance imperative._

_Report to: Hojo'_

I looked again at the picture, and felt a dim kind of sympathy for the poor kid. Whoever she was, if Hojo was interested in her, she was in really deep shit.

"Can I help you, Reno?"

Holy shit, I nearly jumped out of my skin. I spun round on the spot, a guilty look on my face. The file slipped off the table and fell to the floor.

Tseng was standing in the doorway, his arms folded in impatience and a frown of disapproval on his face. I scratched the back of my neck.

"H-hey boss. You left your door open, and I uh -"

"So I see." He butted in, looking at the room, as if expecting to see something missing. "Is there a reason why you're in my office? Were you expecting to find me hiding in the filing cabinet? As flattering as that is, I doubt I would be able to fit."

Not for the first time with Tseng, I had no idea what the hell to say. Was that Tseng's attempt at humour? To give myself a little thinking time, I stooped down to pick up the file, then handed it to him. He strode over to the filing cabinet and placed it inside. "I was wondering if you were here to hand in your report? You seemed so eager to finish it this morning."

Ah hell, I knew that would come back to bite me in the ass. Lets try to change the subject.

"I... just wanted to ask if you'd got any leads on those douchebags that jumped us last night."

Good one, Reno. Maybe you ain't such a shitty liar after all.

Tseng sat himself in his chair and sighed, leaning forwards and rubbing his temples. Almost instinctively I shut the door and sat myself down in one of the chairs opposite the desk.

"No." He admitted quietly. Something in his voice sounded different, almost like we weren't at work at all. Not wanting to get shut out, I stayed silent (for a change) and listened. "I've just been to see Heidigger about it. It's obvious enough that the attack was planned, and it wasn't just a half-baked idea like something you or Rude would come up with." I nearly opened my mouth to object, but thought twice about it. "There have been rumours of an Anti-Shinra terrorist group for some time, but recently you may have noticed we've had more... business than usual. I'd like to take an educated guess and say the reason for it is those men we met last night."

There was a silence, and Tseng looked up at me with those dark obsideon eyes, a severe expression on his face.

"You think they'll try that crap again?"

"I think that I won't be sending you or Rude out solo for a while." He looked at me hard. "And you, for a change, should be careful. Those men wanted us out of the way for a reason."

I got up. I know Tseng pretty damn well by now, and I knew when the end of a conversation had arrived. He picked up his pen and started writing on a fresh sheet of paper. Making for the door, something started gnawing at my slow-moving brain, like I had a rat scurrying around inside my head.

"What the hell are they after us for, anyway?"

Tseng put his pen down slowly for a second, glancing upwards.

"That," he growled dangerously, "is precisely what I intend to find out."


	10. Chapter 10

Note: First, I realised that I've been making continuity mistakes (which will get sorted when I have time to edit) : Tseng's Company took place FOUR months ago... yup, your author is a dumbass. Also, I just wanna nudge people to leave reviews. I know, I'm a pain, but the only reason this stuff is going up online is so that other people can enjoy, and if I don't get reviews I don't have a clue if it's being enjoyed.  
>Plus, it makes me happy n_n<p>

Chapter 10

Tseng's warning hung over my head all damn day. Don't get me wrong, over the years my brain has pretty much perfected the 'in one ear, out the other and half way across the continent' mode, but I'd never seen Tseng actually take me into his confidence like that before. Sure, I was second in command, but Tseng was such a damn control freak he liked to keep all the serious shit to himself; and outside of work? Well, apart from the times when I'd been a total dumbass during the day, we didn't talk about that shit. It was an unspoken rule - what happens in Shinra, stays in Shinra. Hell even Turks need some R & R.

Anyway, the point was that this time, the message got through. Generally there's always someone out to make a name for themselves - you know 'I'm a badass and I'm gonna kill a Turk', but those guys normally ended up with what little brains they had making a little modern art of the wall of dark alley somewhere. This was different. That asshole with the scars on his face looked almost as schitzo as Tseng himself, and believe me - that ain't no small achievement.

Altogether, I hadn't had the greatest 24 hours of my life. I mean, getting to see Tseng practically scream in pleasure didn't exactly hurt my ego, but the rest of it had been about as pleasant as Heidigger's ass. Being held hostage, nearly blown up, shot, set on fire, and had my throat ripped open by some guy with an overused chopping board for a face aint my idea of fun. Nor is being stared at by overpaid, cross dressing, raping bastards, who deserved to have their dicks ripped off and fed to them.

By the end of the shift the only damn thing I wanted to do was either drink myself into fucking obliviion, or head over to that sexy but oh-such-a-bastard of a boss' apartment and get him to screw me into oblivion instead. I'm a creature of habit, can I help that? My life outside of work pretty much consists of drinking my damn braincells into submission, or screwing like a pair of horny teenagers with Tseng. To be honest, those are the only two things that stop this Turk from completely losing the plot.

Tseng had gone completely obsessive over this Wutaian guy. If there's one thing that pisses Tseng off, it's his work ethic being insulted. I guess it didn't help that the bastard had put a gun to my head and tried to give me an extreme facelift. In any case, Tseng had gone completely batshit insane, and was currently sitting up in Shinra Tower with a stack of old files doing research; doing unpaid overtime like a crack whore in a damn coke den. No sex for this guy tonight, so instead I was sitting at me and Rude's usual bar, drinking away his winnings while the stupid bald bastard wondered why his money was going so fast.

"You buyin'?" Rude grunted at me, his sunglasses a little askew; or was that my vision? Fuck knows, it still looked ridiculous.

I sat back in the leather chair, an arm behind my head, smirking drunkenly as I knocked back another shot. "Nah, I bought the last one."

"...you did?" I had double vision. I watched as both Rudes scratched their bald heads, confused looks on their faces.. I half expected to hear squeaking as the dumb, slow cogs started to turn. Rude's brain isn't the fastest even when he's sober, but when the idiot's way past drunk? A lobotomized hamster could probably outwit him.

He swayed and got up out of the chair, apparently deciding that it was way too difficult to work out what had happened less than a minute ago, and started trying to walk in a straight line towards the bar. He'd always had a thing for the barmaid, so I was guessing he'd be a few minutes. I lit up a cigarette and took a look around.

It was a dive: crappy plastic chairs, lurid neon lights, and the permanent smell of vomit floating in the air. A few wasted regulars were dotted around, either throwing up in the corners, beating the flying crap out of each other, or just passed out peacefully on the floor. Yup, home sweet home: Your average Midgar drinking hole.

This place was pretty much my second home. Not that my first home was a god damn five star hotel or anything, but hey, it was a roof - which was a hell of a lot more than I'd had down in the Slums. My first day on the job, Rude had dragged me out here for a celebratory drink. Well, several. Okay, I'll admit it: I had so much to drink that night that I swear I've still got the 'd been in here nearly every night since.

Rude was propping up the bar now, his knees kinda buckled under his own hugeass weight as the barmaid poured the drinks, making small talk. Heh, a few months ago, I'd've probably been up there too, trying to get sweet talk her just to piss Rude off. Lucky for him I realised I wanted to bat for the other team.

Someone walked in front of me, apparently staggering towards the door. Only they didn't make it that far.

The guy turned to look at me, his face curled in an ugly snarl, swaying on the spot. I just glared up at him, wondering what the hell his problem was.

"Hey..." The guy drawled, planting a hand on the table in front of me. "You're Reno, right?"

I peered round him. Rude was still being driven by his cock, talking to the barmaid. No help coming from there, then. Thanks, buddy.

"And if I am?" The guy didn't look so tough - short, squat, with greasy black hair and an ugly face that reminded me of a Marlboro with brain damage. If the guy wanted to get into a fist fight, I was betting I could take him.

He leaned forward a little, his eyes out of focus, in a way that was apparently meant to be intimidating. He sneered at me. "If you are, you won't be for much longer." He muttered, reaching into his pocket. I tensed, ready to grab Lola. "I'm gonna cut you into so many pieces, Shinra won't find all your body parts for years."

He pulled his hand out of his pocket, and with it came a switchblade. He grinned at me drunkenly as it snapped open. Ugh fuck. I hadn't been in the mood for a barfight anyway, but bringing a knife into the mix? That was just cheating.

I sighed and reached into my jacket for Lola. I hadn't planned on ending my night out with a body dump, but if this guy was so fucking hell-bent on suicide...

I reached up to my gun holster and grabbed... thin air.

Shit.

Lola was missing.


	11. Chapter 11

Chapter 11

The guy looked down at me, grinning, the switchblade reflecting the dim green neon striplight behind my head, while I sat there fucking weaponless.

Why the hell hadn't I realised my gun was missing before?

My eyes darted over his shoulder. I could see the back of Rude's head - shiny, pink, and completely fucking useless. The bastard hadn't noticed anything, and now? Now it was too late.

"You gonna say something?" Mocked the guy with the knife. He was speaking lowly, making sure the only person that heard was the weaponless idiot right here in the chair. "I thought you were meant to be tough. Looks like Shinra's all talk after all."

I growled under my breath, sitting forwards. Sure, I never expected to live to a ripe old age - go grey, buy a rocking chair, end up with false teeth, an incontinence problem and a walking frame, but then I sure as hell didn't want to die here - stabbed to death by a booze addled greasemonkey in a crappy, vomit-soaked bar.

I could only imagine what Tseng'd say at my funeral.

"You put that knife down, you'll find out who's all talk." I said - a little louder than the guy in front of me. I was hoping Rude would hear my voice and run to my rescue, but Rude's a hell of a lot like me when it comes to picking up chicks. Everything else just goes over your head.

The guy just chuckled. "Oh yeah, I bet you'd love that." The blade came nearer. I tried my damndest not to draw back. Even if I was drunk and Lola-less, I still had my damn pride. "You'd love to add another victim to your collection, wouldn't ya? But not tonight."

The guy leaned further forwards and placed the knife against one of the scars on my cheek. I hate to admit it, but I flinched - only a little. Anywhere else, I would have kept my cool, but there? I'd had enough knives in my fucking face to last me more than a lifetime. It was enough to make the guy feel smug, though. "Get up, Turk. We're going for a walk."

My mind was practically doing fucking cartwheels, the amount of thinking I was trying to do. You ever been in a life-or-death situation? Trust me, it does wonders for your IQ. Shame it ain't permanent, or I'd've been a goddamn genius by now. The adrenaline was sobering me up fast - my double vision was gone. A plan was slowly forming... I just needed a little more time.

"Now!" Hissed the knife guy. Now that he was in focus, I realised something.

Something that made my stomach feel like it was inside a car crusher.

This guy... this apparently drunken, stupid guy had been faking it.

He was stone cold sober. This wasn't some stupid drunken attack. It was planned.

Well, if he could fake it, so could I.

I stood up, swaying slightly and holding onto the wall for support. He snorted in laughter and his ugly little hand waved the knife in my direction. "Look at this. The high-and-mighty Turk, completely out of his face. Don't worry, you're probably so drunk it won't hurt much when I rip your guts out."

"Try it... pussy." I slurred, stumbling past him, my eyes out of focus. I felt the knife pressing into my back now. My heart felt like it was about to rip through my chest like an alien. Could I pull this off? Come on, Reno, you've had enough practice acting drunk before...

Last chance to make my move. Once we were outside I was a dead man.

Ah fuck, this was really going to hurt.

I pretended to stumble over one of the crappy plastic chairs, and threw myself down, as far away from that knife as possible. Splaying out as I fell, three or four empty chairs overturned, filling the entire damn bar with a ruckus so loud I thought my eardrums were going to explode. I collided with the floor at full force. My head smacked against the black, sticky tiles so hard I was sure it must have cracked open like an egg. I had no idea what was happening - I felt like I was staring at a goddamn disco ball as lights flashed in front of my eyes - but I listened.

Either I was about to get turned into Turk shish-kebab, or my plan was going to work.

There was the smallest god damn silence, but to me it felt like a million years, lying there, expecting any minute to feel steel sever my spine. Then came a roar that sounded like an angry bull, and three gunshots. Screams, the sound of breaking glass, running footsteps, a door slamming. And then silence.

Well, I wasn't dead, that at least was a good sign. I tried to sit up, but my head hurt so damn much that my muscles decided to follow suit. Suddenly I was aching like hell, and I could feel something warm and sticky running down my forehead.

"Reno."

That was Rude's concerned voice, unless the fall had completely fucked me up. I tried to open an eye, but whatever was running down my head seeped into my eyes.

"...Ow." Came my amazingly articulate reply.

I felt myself being lifted up - about as easily as a rag doll.

"Oh, thank god, he's alive." That was a woman's voice - the barmaid, I think. "Rude, put him down here. Let me take a look." Somebody put something cold against my head and I was sat in a chair. After a moment, I managed to open my eyes.

Everything was blurry as hell - worse than if I'd knocked back the entire Midgar spirit supply. My head was thumping like someone was mining for gold in there. I raised a hand to my pounding head - only to have my wrist pulled back down to my side by an out-of-focus brunette woman.

Apparently, the rest of the regulars had bolted home as soon as they sensed trouble. Best not to get involved with Shinra's battles.

"Did... did'ja get the bastard?" I croaked. Rude growled.

"Got away." He sounded unbelieveably pissed. Good. It was his damn fault I had to throw myself on the floor in the first place.

"'S cause you're a crap shot."

The barmaid tutted. "You would have died if it wasn't for Rude!" Apparently she didn't get my humour. "He was so brave. He worked out what had happened straight away." She did, however, seem pretty determined to defend the guy. Even in my fucked up state, I couldn't help smirking weakly. It was about time he got laid. Maybe he'd loosen up a little.

The barmaid stood up and went to get some bandages, and I slowly realised that the stuff pouring down my face was blood. My vision started to focus a little more and I looked down - my shirt was nearly red. Apparently I really had cracked my head open on the way down.

"Sounds like she's sweet on you, big guy."

"She gave me her number."

"Think she'd hook up with me?"

"The way you look now? No."

Ah thanks Rude, glad to know you'll be there if I need an ego boost. "What happened?"

The weak smirk fell off my face like it was greased, remembering the reason I got into the shit mess in the first place. Truth was, I had no idea where the hell Lola was. Had I left her back at my apartment? Tseng's apartment? Oh shit, had I lost it down in the pawn shop?!

I explained groggily- trying not to hurl all over the guy through pain - what had happened - the drunk, the knife, the threat, my gun... and finally deciding to fall flat on my fucking face just to pull his attention away from getting laid. His brow furrowed. "You should tell the boss."

I tried to imagine how Tseng would take the news. I could only imagine it would end with me being thrown from a 69th floor window. "Nah, he's got enough crap to deal with."

Rude saw straight through it. He just snorted at me. "Chicken."

You know, I always thought Rude had missed his calling. He would have made an awesome sports commentator. He was always so damn articulate.

The barmaid came back into the room, a concerned look on her face. She handed me a glass of water and started cleaning up my face gently. I could taste blood, my head, nose, chest, knees - screw it. Everything fucking hurt. As I sat there, covered in blood, sipping down ice water, being called chicken, and suddenly feeling the loss of Lola like a body part, I was beginning to wonder whether letting the guy rip my guts out with a knife might have been a funner end to the night.

"I've cleaned you up as best I can." The brunette said a few minutes later. Well, I felt a little better anyway. I tried to give her one of my seductive looks, just to make me feel a little better, y'know? She just smiled at me weirdly. Apparently my sex appeal wasn't at it's best when I'd just thrown myself onto a concrete floor. "You should still go into a hospital overnight. Just in case you have concussion."

I froze.

"No. No, no way in hell!" I stood up, dizzy as fuck but determined to stay upright. Rude and the barmaid stood up with me. They both looked beyond nonplussed. "I mean... I feel fine." I added weakly.

Yeah Reno, because smashing your damn head open and nearly being gutted? Better than sex, booze and cigarettes all rolled into one.

You know, I used to love getting sent to the hospital floor. I used to try faking every goddamn disease known to humanity just so I could spend half a day down there. For one reason, I'd get to sit around doing jack shit and get paid for it, which in turn made Tseng so frustrated he nearly had a fit, which in turn made me practically fucking giddy with amusement. Secondly, if I was _really_ lucky, I'd spend a few days surrounded by smoking hot nurses in tight uniforms who thought that I was a Sex God. It was like being in my own private porn film. And thirdly, there was the absolute insane high of Mako Fluid. Man, that stuff made you feel like you were floating on air, surrounded by butterflies and unicorns and pixies and shit. even if - like me - you'd been shot in three different places, or hell even electrocuted half to death with your own EMR, a few minutes with that stuff and you'd think you were halfway to the moon.

The trouble was that none of it appealed anymore. At all. In fact, anybody even mentioned heading down to the hospital floor and I broke out into a cold sweat. Hospitals, Mako fluid... that stuff was now nightmare material, kept locked as far down into my twisted little subconscious as it possibly could be. But then, how the hell were Rude and this chick to know that I'd rather bleed to death than spend half a day up there?

I started walking towards the door, unsteady as hell.

"Don't be a dumbass. Sit."

"Make me." I spat.

Bad choice of words.

The next thing I knew I was back on Rude's shoulder, like a sack of potatoes or something. Sometimes it sucks being this slim and attractive.

"Fuck you, Rude. I'm goin' home. Try an' stop me an' I'll use your balls as a hat."

Yeah it was an empty threat, and a fucking bad one at that, but it was the best I could do. Satan would be ice skating to work before I put another foot in that god damn hospital, even if I had to bite Rude's arms off and beat him to death with them to let me go.

"Shut up Reno." Rude growled, apparently not phased by my pathetic struggles to get free. Didn't stop me trying though. In fact, I was so damn busy flailing like a dying fish, that it took me five minutes to realise we weren't in the bar anymore. I stopped struggling. Like I could get out of Rude's grip of death, anyway.

"Can ya at least put me the hell down?" I sighed. My head was throbbing, and Rude ain't exactly got the most elegant walk in the world. Besides, I was starting to get bored of looking at his ass.

"You gonna run?"

"...Do I _look_ like I could fucking run?"

He seemed to consider it a second. I'd been known to try some stupid shit when I was injured, but the way I felt right now, I'd be lucky to make it ten feet without falling flat on my face. Again.

Rude seemed to come to the same conclusion. He placed me on the pavement with about as much effort as putting down a paper bag, then he looked at me, irritatedly. I just rubbed my head and looked around.

We were standing in the urine-soaked alley outside my apartment.

I glared at him. "I thought you and your _wife_ were takin' me to the hospital."

"You want me to make you go?" He asked, wiping my blood off his shoulder. I opened my mouth, ready to insult the living crap out of the guy for being such a bastard, but then I closed it again. I hadn't even said thank you, and I'd probably stopped the poor guy getting laid tonight.

I mean, there was about as much chance of me saying thank you to the son of a bitch as seeing Palmer take up ballet, but still, I wasn't gonna tear him a new one just for bringing me home.

"...Guess you ain't as much of a bastard as I thought." I gave him a half-assed smirk and pulled my goggles off to ease my aching head, letting my bangs fall down over my face. "Hell of a night."

"Tell me about it."

With the little energy I had left I smacked the guy on the shoulder, kind of non-verbal affection. "See ya in work tomorrow."

Rude snorted and smacked me back, adding a bruised shoulder to all the other aches and pains I had.

"Huh. If you're not dead yet."

He turned on his heel and stomped away towards the end of the alley, with all the grace of a wounded elephant, then He turned the corner and disappeared from sight.

Once he'd disappeared, I stumbled up the steps and tried to open the door as quietly as possible. My head was getting worse, my entire body ached like hell, and I was more than a little upset about losing Lola; not to mention the amount of thoughts buzzing round my head... The ambush in the slums; the trap at the bar... were they all part of the same thing? Did the guy at the bar somehow know I had no gun?

Ugh, this was making my brain hurt. I'd ask Tseng... when I built up the courage to tell him, that is.

I took my blood soaked shirt off as soon as the door closed, and dumped it on the already cluttered floor. All I wanted to do was climb into bed and sleep this shit off like a bad dream. Hey who knows, when I woke up, I might have dreamed the whole fucking mess.

Yeah, I've tried that method before. It ain't worked so far, but who knows, right?

I was about to head through to the bedroom when something stopped me. I couldn't tell ya what it was - a feeling, a sound, a smell... just something that put the hairs up on the back of my neck.

I was tired, headsore and bruised, but Tseng trained me pretty damn well, and I know when to follow my instincts. Right now my instincts were telling me that something was wrong. Really wrong.

I looked around in the dark in a panic. Surely the same crap couldn't happen to me three times in 24 hours?

But I could feel it: There was somebody in the apartment.


	12. Chapter 12

Note: Thank you for the reviews. It makes me insanely happy to know that people are still enjoying this as much as I am.

Chapter 12

So here I was: inside my pitch black apartment (apart from the crappy radioactive glow from the nearby Mako reactor), weaponless, dizzy as fuck with a bleeding skull, and someone - something - in the apartment with me. I had no idea where, whether they could see me, whether I was about to have my brains blown out across the peeling wallpaper.

As days go, this one wasn't turning out to be the best.

I tried to stay as still as possible, listening for anything apart from the hum of the reactor half a block away, and screeching tyres in the distance. It felt like the whole damn apartment was alive with noises - the drip of that stupid leaking kitchen tap, the clock ticking like a fucking time bomb on the wall... how the hell was I supposed to work out where this intruder was?

Not only that, but my head was getting worse by the second. There were lights flashing behind my eyes, and the makeshift dressing on my head wasn't working anymore - I could feel the blood starting to trickle down my forehead, along with enough nervous sweat to fill a couple of buckets.

Yeah, I'll admit it: I was frightened. Fuck it, I was so damn scared I was ready to crap my pants. Life or death goes with the job - I knew that from the minute I signed my soul over to Shinra - and I can deal with giving up my right to live to a ripe old age, but someone had tried to murder me way too many times today. My nerves were shot to fuck. I was about ready to curl up in a ball somewhere dark and quiet and start rocking to myself.

Well, I couldn't just stand here and wait for the bastards to find me. I took a deep (and quiet) breath, gulped down my fear, and walked into the bedroom. My EMR was lying at the side of the bed. If they had a gun, I was still fucked, but I might just be able to take the bastard with me.

"You're late, Reno."

There was a click. The light turned on. I shielded my eyes and tried not to let my heart escape out of my mouth.

Tseng.

He stood there next to the door, his long fingers on the light switch. He looked like he'd made himself comfortable - in shirtsleeves, his shirt unbuttoned for once, and that tie that was normally done up so damn tight it nearly strangled the guy was now undone, hanging around his neck. The bastard had a smirk on his face, as though frightening the shit out of me was somehow amusing as fuck. Son of a bitch.

The smirk fell off his face almost immediately though. His eyes flicked up to my bleeding head, and one of those rare looks of concern filtered onto his face. He blanched and mumbled my name. At least I think he did.

I sank to my knees, clinging to the doorway in some stupid attempt to stay upright. Unsurprisingly it didn't work. I fell forward, and everything faded to black.

I was lying on my back. I think. It was hard to work out where exactly I was, or why the hell I was there. Something was stinging the back of my throat like I'd just had acid poured down my damn throat. What the hell was that?

I answered my own question a second later: I sat up and hurled what felt like half my internal organs across the room. Attractive.

"Good morning to you, too."

I felt something soothing and cool against my head and sighed. Someone wrapped an arm up around my back. Someone whose touch made me feel like I'd just been tranquilised.

"Hey boss." I croaked. My head hurt like a bitch. I didn't want to open my eyes. I felt like if I did my eyes would probably fall out their damn sockets. "...what happened?"

There was a pause. Tseng stroked my hair gently out of my sweaty face. Even in... well, whatever state I was in... I still leaned in to the touch like the the pussy I am. I felt him lean into my ear. "I was going to ask you the same question." He muttered gently.

It was hard to think - ok, it was hard for me to make my brain work on the best of days, but right now it felt like someone had poured treacle in there. I forced myself to open my eyes.

I was lying on my own half-broken bed, covered in a clean sheet that Tseng had somehow made magically appear. In front of me was a bowl full of... yeah, let's just skip that part. My face no longer felt sticky with blood, and Tseng was leaning close over me, his hair tied back in a ponytail and those dark serious eyes full of concern and affection as he dabbed at my forehead with a wet towel.

"Bastard had a knife." I tried to explain. Tseng's brow furrowed, getting the wrong end of the stick. Having your head cracked open and the shit scared out of you doesn't make for great explainations. I gulped down the bile in my throat. "I mean... tried to knife me. Cracked my head open on the... fucking floor."

Well, that was the best explaination I could manage. Tseng's lip twitched a little.

"How very clumsy of you."

I knew Tseng well enough by now to know that this was his fucked up way of trying to make me feel better. I must have looked like hell, and projectile vomiting into a bowl didn't exactly make me feel like a sex machine, but still... I had to smirk a little at the concern - which, believe it or not, is what he was trying to say. Yeah, I know. Sometimes talking to Tseng felt like I was trying to learn another goddamn language.

"...Habit of a lifetime." I managed, trying to sound offhanded.

Then leaned forwards and threw up again.

Ugh. Maybe offhanded wasn't gonna work tonight.

Tseng frowned again, maybe he guessed that I was changing the subject, trying to avoid admitting I'd been a stupid dick and lost my gun. Do you blame me? I already felt like shit. Having a psychoticly angry Turk scolding me wasn't gonna make me feel better. He seemed to think so too, and started dressing whatever injury I had on my head - it occured to me I hadn't looked in a mirror since this crap had happened. I had no idea how badly I was hurt, but judging from Tseng's face, I was guessing it was pretty bad.

"How's it look, doc?" Tseng's eyes darted down from his work to mine. The reference wasn't lost on him. He 'hn'-ed his displeasure, not that it phased me - he was absently brushing his fingers over my forehead at the time. Not his most intimidating moment.

"Reno, you have a head wound, blood loss and concussion." He said sternly, but quietly. "How do you think it looks, you idiot?"

I closed my eyes as Tseng's fingers traced my aching head. He has this touch that just makes me fucking melt, no matter where I am or how pissed off at the guy I am, and he damn well knows it. Any idea how difficult it is to stay pissed at a guy who can make you turn to jello with his fingertips?

At this moment in time, though, I was glad about it. I smiled sedately like the sucker I am and let him finish cleaning me up.

"Y'know, this is becoming habit." I drawled tiredly.

"Hmmm?" I felt him draw back and sit on the edge of the bed, watching me.

"Well, you know. I get fucked up and you play doctor. I think ya like it."

Tseng laughed lowly. "I'm starting to think you do it on purpose." He muttered. I heard the rustle of clothes. He moved the really not pleasant bowl off the bed, apparently working out I was feeling better. The next second the guy had climbed into bed next to me, wrapping one of those smooth arms around my back and pulling me to lie on his chest. I sighed and let him, just enjoying the comfort.

Yeah, I know, for a hired hitman, I'm a pussy. I can shoot assholes all damn day without feeling anything except a sore trigger finger, but as soon as Tseng puts a hand on me, I melt into a puddle of damn jelly. Not exactly great for my reputation, is it?

"Reno, I'm sorry." Huh? I blinked my sore eyes open and looked up at Tseng. He was frowning again, staring up at the damp patches on my ceiling. "I should have called you before I came over."

I'd completely forgotten in all the concussion, blood and vomit - Tseng was normally mister Caution when it came to our extra-carricular activities. He had every damn right to be, too: If word got out that two of Shinra's most badass Turks were banging like two nymphos on viagra, it could seriously fuck up our reputation. But that wasn't the only reason.

We were being watched.

If there's one thing that Rufus psycho Shinra was good at, it was holding a grudge. Tseng was pretty sure the guy was using his money, keeping an eye on us, looking for something to use as leverage, so we had to be careful as hell. It meant meeting at stupid-o-clock at night, in random back-alleys; pretending to be going to each other's apartments to discuss work... anything to stop people guessing we were really screwing each other's brains out. Last night had been a risk. This was just fucking dangerous.

What the hell had made Tseng - a goddamn walking textbook on patience - throw the rules out the damn window?

I felt myself go dizzy again, this time not through the damn pain in my head. It just hit me that whatever was wrong, he'd come to me for comfort.

I tried not to let that thought make my brain explode in shock. "Something on your mind, boss?" I mumbled. Like the girl I am, I leaned in and kissed his chest tiredly. His lips twitched upward just a little, and his frown eased.

"I'll tell you in the morning."

"Fuck that." I snorted. Tseng's magic hands must have done the trick, 'cause I was feeling obnoxious again. "I'm concussed, Tseng, not brain damaged."

Tseng glared down at me playfully. "That's a matter of opinion." He growled.

Bastard. I kicked him with all the strength I had left, which - let's face it - was about the same amount of strength as an elderly stick-insect. He purred out an honest laugh and slid down the bed, face to face with me, looking at me scrutinizingly. "You really want to know?"

I nodded, trying to look as together as possible, even if I did feel like my brain was about to leak out of my damn head. He sighed. "Why are you so irritatingly stubborn?"

I couldn't help but grin, even though it made me feel like I was about to pass out again. "Hey, I had a great teacher."

Another glare, but I could already tell he'd made his mind up. He knew I wasn't gonna let him get away with being the stoic son of a bitch tonight. There was something bothering the guy, and if I had to threaten to bash my already fucked up head against the wall until he answered, I was gonna get the truth out of him.

"Fine." He growled, giving in... at fucking last. "I'll tell you." I opened my mouth in a question, but Tseng gave me that damn Icy stare and cut me off. "If, of course, you tell me _exactly_ how you got that wound."

You know, I was really hoping that wouldn't come up. I didn't want to think what the hell Tseng was going to say when he found out I'd lost Lola. He'd probably rip my arms off and beat me to death with them, even if we were off duty.

Still... if Tseng was here, there was something serious going on. I could always pretend to pass out again, just to avoid having to answer til morning, but Tseng knew me too damn well - he knew I was way too nosey for my own good.

I gulped and nodded again.

Ah shit, he was gonna kill me.

Tseng sat up with a sigh, the humor gone suddenly from his face. "...I spent the evening researching, and I've worked out something. That man in the pawn shop... I couldn't place him before, but I know now. I finally know who the Wutaian is."


	13. Chapter 13

Chapter 13

"I was a new recruit; less than a year had passed since I had watched my mother-"

Pause. I sat up next to him slowly, trying not to interrupt or go dizzy. Tseng's voice was low and serious. I'd only ever heard this tone of voice once before, and that was right at the start of this little affair. My mind flashed back to that night, standing butt naked in my kitchen as Tseng poured his goddamn soul out to me. His crappy childhood, his mom's death... the reason he'd travelled right across the damn world and joined Shinra. Tseng's face was in shadow, and my eyes were too out of focus anyway, but I'd bet my ass that he was frowning, pinching the bridge of his nose in that stupid stoic way. I resisted the urge to reach out and touch his shoulder, treating him like the time bomb he was: one wrong move and the guy would clam up. I just listened. For a change.

"...Shinra had agreed to facilitate my revenge, in exchange for a lifetime in service. I still consider it an excellent deal. They gave me an address in Wutai where I could find information in the whereabouts of my father. Of course, I tried to be discreet, but..." He sighed forcefully, lowering his head under the weight of some kind of memory. "the lust for revenge - as you know very well - can override our better senses."

I was waiting for it. Waiting for the obvious damn bombshell Tseng was getting ready to drop on me. He wouldn't be going into all these old wounds unless there was a reason for it. He glanced over at me sideways. I tried to force my face into neutral.

"Do you remember the Wutaian's face, Reno?"

I snorted a little. "Ain't exactly a face I'm gonna forget in a hurry. The guy looked like someone had took a chainsaw to... his-" I trailed off, my brain suddenly catching up with my mouth. Something clicked into place. My stomach sank like a body in the sewers. "Shit. It was you?"

Tseng didn't answer. He moved uncomfortably on the bed and looked away. I gulped, remembering the deep, vicious slashes across the guy's face. Tseng had done that?

"I thought he had information. He kept denying he knew anything, but I was convinced, and I was young - full of anger. So... I took a knife..."

I didn't need to hear the rest. I raised my hand to my face and trailed my fingers across my cheeks - feeling the scars underneath my fingers. I felt sick. Torture didn't normally bother me much - it came as part of the job, but Tseng... the guy I trusted so much it fucking hurt... the guy who I'd always thought of as a twisted kind of saint since he came into this fucked up world... the guy sitting in the bed next to me had ripped someone's face open in anger. It sounded sickeningly familiar.

"Did he-" I cleared my throat, trying to force the damn bile and confusion down. I didn't want Tseng to know what I was thinking; he seemed freaked out enough as it was. "I mean... did you find out what he knew?"

Tseng laughed coldly. It sent a goddamn chill down my spine. "No, Reno. You don't understand." He looked at me suddenly, a bitter sort of smile on his face. "He really knew nothing. I destroyed a man's face for no reason."

Again, sounded fucking familiar. I suddenly felt Tseng's hand on my wrist and I jumped. I realised I'd still been tracing the scars on my face as he was speaking.

"Reno." He muttered. His voice suddenly sounded full of guilt. "Should I go?"

Once again, Tseng's brain was way too fast for comfort. If the bastard had just been a little slower on the uptake, I could have hidden how freaked I was. Why the hell did I have to get with such a smart bastard? Lying to the guy was almost as hard as trying to teach Rude to tie his shoelaces.

I gulped down my bile again and pulled my hand from his grip. Tseng frowned deeply, but then nodded and began to get up off the bed.

I stared at the guy's back as he swung his legs off the bed and reached down to grab his shirt, trying to take it all in. A small part of me was struggling with the idea of a young, angry, vengeful Tseng. I could see the guy from the pawn shop in my mind's eye - his face. That face. What a piece of work.

Tseng had done that shit to him, the same way I'd got mine.

But...

I suddenly let out a deep breath and threw the sheet away, kneeling up on the bed behind him. A second later I'd pulled his hair out of that stupid ponytail, letting it fall over his shoulders silently. He paused with his shirt half on as I leaned forwards, wrapping my arms around his stomach. I still didn't know what the hell to say, but even though my mouth runs off like a runaway train half the time, this time actions pretty much spoke for themselves.

I leaned in, breathing in his hair as the guy relaxed back against me, intertwining his fingers with mine slowly.

Even if he had fucked an innocent guy's face up - that was years ago, and he didn't like it any more than I did. I've done stuff in my past I ain't proud of - too damn much to count, and yeah sometimes it had come back to bite me in the ass, but Tseng... dammit, he'd come to me for a little comfort. I wasn't that much of a bastard. At least, not to the freakin' love of my life.

"Get your stupid ass back in bed." I mumbled into his hair, breathing in that fucking beautiful smell, feeling his warm skin against mine. It calmed me down, drove off that sick feeling in my gut, somehow stopped me feeling dizzy. I heard Tseng let out a long breath of relief.

"Are you trying to give your superior orders?" He muttered back after a moment. Now that was the Tseng I knew. I just snorted.

"Right now you ain't my superior. You're a dumbass."

Any other time I'd be running for the damn hills after that last sentence, but right now it was what was needed. Tseng needed a little banter to get his mind off the past. Heh, if there's anybody on the whole damn planet that could understand that, it was me.

Tseng turned his head, moving that amazing hair over his shoulder so he could see my face. I forced a smirk and narrowed my eyes, ready for the next reply.

I was expecting a threat; an insult; hell, maybe even a smack upside the head. Here's what I got instead:

Tseng's eyes flickered with some kind of emotion, though what that damn emotion was, I wish I knew. I could see my own disheveled face reflected in them with the green glow from outside the window. He stared at me for a second, apparently thinking, then leaned up and pressed his lips against mine, holding my fingers tightly in his.

Huh. Who knew calling someone a dumbass would end like this? I should really tell Rude to change his chatup lines.


	14. Chapter 14

Chapter 14

Tseng might be icier than the northern glaciers during a normal day. Sometimes it was hard to work out if he was even goddamn human and not just some emotionless paperwork machine, but if there's one thing that can convince me he's not just some soulless demon with a penchant for suits, violence and intimidation, it's the way he kisses.

He pressed his lips against mine so damn softly it could've just been a fantasy of mine; and if I hadn't felt his fingers squeezing mine at the time, I woulda been half convinced I was dreaming. The pounding in my head faded into the background, all the damn stress of the past day and a half faded away. How the hell did he do it? Tseng's kisses always seemed so damn warm, considering the cold bastard they came from, and they always seemed to give this pushover of a Turk temporary amnesia.

Tseng loosened his grip on my fingers and slid them up my arm to my neck, making me practically purr. I just dragged my hands across his chest, feeling the muscles ripple under my touch. The guy has a nice chest, ok? I just wish I got to touch the damn thing more often, and not just brush past it... er 'accidentally' during work hours.

After a moment, Tseng pulled back from the kiss reluctantly, his eyes lidded a little and his hand still stroking the base of my neck. As usual, my body decided that it was gonna take it upon itself to react, whether I damn well liked it or not - I tilted my head forward to give him better access, my fingers clinging to his chest like there was a damn magnet in there, resting my head on his shoulder.

"I should still go." He said quietly. "This was dangerous."

I growled, unable to form a sentence. I was too busy being turned into jello by Tseng's fingers. I felt his shoulders shake in a silent laugh. I didn't know whether to punch the bastard or laugh with him.

"Mmm... look, what damn difference does it make now you're here?" I managed to mutter thickly, between purrs. "Stay. Get your ass back into bed."

I didn't want the guy to leave. He was obviously feeling stressed and shitty, and today hadn't exactly been a trip to the Gold Saucer for me either. Me and Tseng don't have a lot of shit to give us comfort - no families, no friends. Well, apart from Rude, and he didn't really count, since talking to him was about as useful as talking to a goldfish. Tseng was about the only thing I had going for me, and I was always pretty sure it was the same for him. Even if we did argue like an old married couple, even if sometimes I thought about setting fire to the bastard and dancing round him, dammit... he was my comfort.

Not that I would ever tell the asshole.

Tseng stayed silent, still sat on the edge of the bed. I wondered what the hell was going through his mind. Through my lidded, still a little blurred eyes, all I could made out was the back of the guy's head, which actually, was probably about as expressive as the front. I decided to push a little. It wasn't exactly my idea of a great night to kneel over the bastard all night. "Tseng, d'you have any intention of taking a knife to _my_ face?"

I wondered for a second if I'd put my hugeass foot in my hugeass mouth again. He sat up straight, looking ready to stand up. I clung like a leech to his chest, just in case.

"...No."

"Good. The scars I got are sexy, but any more and you'll ruin my beautiful face."

"Bighead." He growled, but I knew I could relax now - there was humour in that purring Wutaian accent now. I grinned tiredly.

"So would you be, if you were anywhere near as sexy as me."

Tseng dropped his hand from my neck much to my damn disappointment, and slid round on the bed, facing me. I just grinned wider as Tseng raised an eyebrow defiantly. "So you don't find me sexy, Reno?" He purred, and then the bastard licked his lips slowly. I tried not to react, even if what was a little further down did.

I shrugged. "I didn't say that, I just said you were nowhere near as sexy as me. Not that you're not good looking, boss. I mean... you're Okay, but..."

Tseng's eyes had been narrowing more and more through the whole speech until they were nearly fucking slits. I felt that familiar rush of excitement, adrenaline and good old mortal danger as I trailed off. Teasing Tseng could end in one of two ways - sex or death.

Hell, maybe both.

He leaned in, pressing his chest against mine, his eyes still narrowed as he rested his forehead against me. I carried on grinning so hard I swear my face was gonna fall off, knowing just how damn much it was pissing him off.

"Hmm..." He purred. I felt his hands slip round me, pulling me closer. "I suppose you're right. You are sexier than me." The next thing I knew, Tseng had leaned to the side, brushed his dark cheek against mine, and started brushing his lips against my ear. "...You know what would make you even sexier?"

Now, you should know by now that my brain and my body hate each other with a fucking passion. They hate each other so damn much that they ignore each other and do whatever the hell feels good at the time. Which is why, even though my brain was screaming with warning sirens and flashing red danger signs, my body pretty much said 'screw it', stuck its middle finger up at my brain and leaned in to those lips. I heard myself let out a breath, felt myself slide my fingers up his back and pull him closer. "Don't... tell me you're into leather or something?" I slurred stupidly, not really paying attention to what was coming out of my mouth. "I don't think I got the figure for kinky boots."

I felt Tseng smirk against my ear.

"No, nothing like that. What would make you _really_ sexy..." His fingers traced slowly downwards, over my ribs, my sides, down towards my hips. I was grinning so wide now it fucking hurt, "...Is if you stopped thinking with your dick. Before I cut it off."

Tseng then proceeded to push me back onto the bed by the hips, a triumphant smirk on his face as he tossed the sheet on top of me.

And they say romance is dead.

I flailed with the sheet for a second, in the most un-sexy damn way possible, trying to remember how my legs and arms actually worked after giving in to the seduction. Crap, why did Tseng always win at these games? Couldn't he just throw me a bone once in a while? And yeah, I mean the word bone literally...

"Bastard." I growled, though to be honest I had half a bedsheet smothering my face at the time, not sure how intimidating that one came out.

When I finally escaped from the apparently fool-proof jail that was the bedsheet, Tseng was still standing over me with that smirk, just watching me struggle.

I tossed the balled up sheet at the smug bastard. It missed by at least two feet. Smooth, Reno. Real smooth.

Tseng glanced down at the missile slowly, and then back at me with an eyebrow raised, unimpressed.

"I should demote you." He said evenly, as though we were just sitting in his office, talking about a mission. "You're meant to be a sharpshooter, Reno. That was terrible."

"Screw you, I've got concussion." I snapped, turning over, having a goddamn tantrum like a four year old. Yup, that's me - Mister Maturity. No wonder I was second in command. My intellect was obviously fucking awesome.

I lay there scowling to myself. Seriously, my sex drive has a mind of its own, and it gets pissed off when it doesn't get its own way. I was prepared to lie there, naked, coverless, brooding on how easily Tseng had tricked me for the rest of the damn night. Never mind the attempted disembowelling I'd experienced up close and personal just an hour or so back - being denied sex by Tseng was more important.

A few seconds passed before I felt the bed move under the dickhead's weight. I heard him sigh tiredly behind me and lie down. I could feel the heat from his body, just a few inches away, and It took all my mental strength not to back up a little, just for the touch of his skin. In the end though, I didn't have to.

It took a few seconds, but I felt Tseng move again. The unscrewed sheet slid up my side, and Tseng pressed himself to my back.

We lay like that for a while. I didn't know whether I wanted to nuzzle back like the kiss ass I normally am, or just stay moody as fuck. Moody was proving a point, but it was getting kinda boring fast.

And then he leaned in to my neck and kissed it, in that totally un-Tsenglike, affectionate way.

Ugh. He just had to, didn't he?

I've always been a player - pre-Tseng, affection meant nothing, did nothing except make the girls I was with easier to get in the sack. I never knew how it worked; why the girls wanted me to do all the kissy crap beforehand; but I got it now. After twenty-plus years on this crappy planet, I finally understood why chicks liked affection so damn much.

It was... nice. Comfortable.

...And it made me act like a complete pansy-ass sissy.

I sighed in defeat. There was no way I could win this, Tseng knew that damn well. In the end I couldn't stop myself leaning back against him.

"Fuck you." I mumbled, just for good measure. He stroked my hip in reply and kissed my neck again

"Not until you've recovered." He replied. "And we'll leave the recollection of your drunken idiocy until the morning. It has been a long day."

Well at least that was one good thing. I'd been granted a reprieve from admitting I was even more of a stupid ass than he already thought. It meant I'd just die a horrible death in the morning instead. No point in worrying about that now, that was like decades away.

"...You think he wants revenge?" I asked a while later. The whole thing had been rolling around my brain in the silence. Tseng had obviously been thinking about it, too - he didn't even have to ask who I was talking about.

"...did you want revenge?"

Stupid question, I guess.

I decided to be cocky, pigheaded Reno, for Tseng's sake. "No worries, Tseng. We'll kick his ass next time round."

Tseng didn't answer. He just lay with his face buried in my neck, a hand resting on my hip, pretending - I'm pretty sure - to be asleep.


	15. Chapter 15

Chapter 15

I was lying on the beach. Not those crappy pollution-filled, grey sand-covered ones outside Midgar; a proper damn beach. White sand, blue seas, y'know the ones? Like you see on the TV, when they're trying to sell rum, or penis-extension style cars. I had a glass of tequila in one hand and a cigarette in the other, grinning to myself stupidly as I watched a group of big-boobed chicks bouncing around playing volleyball.

This had to be the best fucking vacation I'd ever had.

I closed my eyes for a second, just enjoying the feeling of the damn sun, instead of the greasy green smog that covered the whole damn plate back home. I took a sip of tequila, felt it burning my throat, and then opened my eyes.

Tseng was standing in front of me, a pair of bright flowery swimming trunks on, his arms folded.

"Enjoying the view?" He growled, raising an eyebrow at me. Behind him, the chicks were now rubbing suntan lotion on each other. I grinned again and took a drag on my cig.

"Thought you were back in Midgar, boss. Y'know, doing paperwork and shit?"

"You really think I'd rather be in Midgar than right here with you?" He sat down in the sand next to me, his oiled chest glinting in the Sun invitingly. He took the tequila off me and knocked it back. "Rude can handle the paperwork for a week."

I suddenly had an image in my head of Rude sitting in Tseng's office, buried neck-deep in paperwork and scratching his bald head stupidly.

"So... you just got up and left? Geez Tseng, didn't think you had it in you."

Tseng turned to me, those fucking seductive dark eyes glimmering and smirked smuttily. looking me up and down. "Well... I don't. Yet."

The next thing I knew, Tseng had rolled over like a flash and straddled me, rubbing what was inside those damn stupid-looking shorts against my crotch. Over his shoulder, the volleyball chicks had stopped oiling each other up to watch as Tseng ground against me, dragging his fingers roughly down my chest, his hair hanging over his dark face and that smuttty smirk still lingering on his face. Damn, even if he hadn't been grinding against me, I probably still would've gone hard, just from the look on his face.

I groaned and tilted my head back, not giving a damn that the chicks on the beach were watching. In fact if I'm honest, it was kinda a turnon.

Tseng growled like a panther and dug his nails into my chest muscles, sending shivers down my spine. The next second, he'd leaned forwards and sank his teeth into my neck, sucking at it roughly. I was probably gonna end up with some serious hickies. Like I gave a fuck. He pulled away and whispered in my ear.

"This is so everybody knows you're mine, Reno."

"I ain't protesting." I answered, peering my eyes open a little. I could see the volleyball chicks coming over, apparently enjoying the show. "Like what you see, ladies?"

The blonde one grinned and knelt down in the sand next to me, then leaned in and started nibbling at my ear. A few seconds later I was covered in hands, trailing across the few parts of my body that Tseng hadn't claimed. Tseng was grinding harder, faster, panting against my neck as I went completely stiff. He groaned my name. I could feel him starting to shudder in my lap as I felt four or five other mouths latch on to my sweet spots...

Like I said: Best vacation ever.

"Get up."

I ignored that voice. It was probably beach patrol or something, not wanting an orgy happening on their turf. Fuck that, I was having the time of my life here. They could wait til I was done. Tseng was groaning my name louder and louder, his member twitching against mine...

"Get up before I drag you up."

It was Tseng's voice. I frowned in confusion.

"I'm already up." I muttered in confusion.

"So I can see."

Something landed on my face. I sat up like I'd just been struck by lightning. The beach disappeared in a flash.

Tseng was standing over me, fully dressed in that stupidly perfect blue suit and a look of pure fucking disgust on his face.

"Out of bed now. I'm not being late for you."

I groaned and lay back down, covering my tired face back up with what turned out to be one of my rare clean shirts, thinking with my overtired brain that maybe if I pretended to be dead, Tseng would leave me the hell alone, and maybe I could pick up that dream where I'd left it.

Fat chance.

"Reno, you have five seconds to vacate that bed, before I set fire to it."

I stayed where I was and whined like a damn baby. "Lemme alone, 'm dead."

"Five."

I decided the best thing was to ignore him. He had to be bluffing.

"Four."

I mean, he wouldn't really set fire to my bed, would he?

"Three."

Come on, I know the guy was a psycho bastard, but he wasn't that goddamn insane.

"Two."

...Right?

"One."

With all the grace of a drunken fish I finally rolled myself out of the bed and thudded painfully to the floor, taking the shirt with me.

Did I mention I'm not great with mornings? After a lifetime of hangovers and late nights, I'd formed a habit. That habit included keeping my curtains closed against the sunshine, and lying in bed til past midday. Unfortunately Tseng didn't seem to have the same opinion.

I heard the muffled sound of an irritated sigh up above me as I threw my arm across my face against the light. The son of a bitch had opened the curtains. I growled in frustration and punched the floor. And regretted it almost immediately as shockwaves of pain shot up my fingers.

"I'm going out to the car, Reno. If you're not ready in ten minutes, I'm coming to drag you out; dressed or not."

I heard him stomp from the room irritably and slam the front door. After a second, I finally lowered my arm.

My head still hurt this morning. Even if it was a little better, it still felt like someone had been beating my brains out with a sledgehammer. I didn't feel dizzy any more, which was at least a plus, but there was something else wrong. Something uncomfortable I just couldn't place.

Look my brain barely works when I'm wide awake, dosed up on caffiene; in the mornings I'm so damn slow I'm nearly going backwards. I'm practically braindead.

Which is why it took me until I stumbled into the shower, swearing incoherently under my breath, to realise that the thing making me so damn uncomfortable was the fucking mother and father of all hardons, threatening to take out the shower tiles if I turned around.

Ah shit. I looked furtively round to make sure Tseng hadn't sneaked back in like the devious son of a bitch he sometimes is.

Ok, I was probably gonna be a little longer than ten minutes, but I was pretty sure Tseng didn't want me catapulting my pants across the car. Hell, this thing would probably get in the way of the gearstick.

I closed my eyes, turned the shower on and smirked. Now, where the hell did I get to in that dream?

"You're late." Tseng snapped, his eyes narrowed, staring straight ahead out of the windscreen.

I just slid into Tseng's pristene '88 model silently, trying not to make any sudden movements. Tseng the Asshole was obviously in business this morning, and by now I'd figured the best thing to do was stay as quiet as possible and wait until he'd consumed his body weight in coffee; after that he tended to be just a little easier to talk to.

Tseng turned to face me, probably expecting me to shoot my mouth off. When he didn't get a reply, he drove off towards the Tower, cars slowing down or pulling over to let us pass as soon as they saw the Shinra badge on the license plate.

One of the few perks of being a Turk - no traffic jams. Everyone was too damn scared you were gonna blow their face off.

Eventually I got bored. I'm not used to keeping my mouth shut for too long, and eventually my mouth just tends to explode with verbal diarrhea. Probably because I work with such quiet, stoic bastards. Somehow I feel like I have to make up for it by talking vast amounts of crap.

"My head still feels kind of shitty, Tseng."

Tseng sighed and sat back in his seat as another car veered dangerously out of the way. Apparently the few minutes of silence had mellowed him out a little.

"If I thought I could spare you today, I would allow you to have the day off. Unfortunately, Reno, now that we know who this Wutaian is, we have a lot of work to do. Heidigger put this on high priority. He seems to think that this group could be a lot more dangerous than he first thought."

"Yeah, I kind of worked that one out when I nearly had my brains blown out."

I thought for a second that Tseng's eyes flickered away from the road towards me for a second, but when I turned my head to look he was concentrating on the view ahead.

"You have yet to tell me what exactly happened last night."

I hesitated for a second, then as usual, chickened the hell out.

"Just a bar fight, nothing important."

"Reno..." Tseng growled warningly. Apparently my amazingly convincing lie hadn't worked.

I gritted my teeth and tensed, as though preparing myself for a punch to the chest, and then, very slowly, opened my mouth to speak.

"-what the?"

We'd arrived in the parking lot, the tower looking over and blocking out the watery sunlight like some huge deformed giant. Tseng slammed on the breaks, skidding sideways across the thankfully nearly empty parking spaces, and nearly sending us both through the damn windshield. We screeched to a halt across three empty spaces, and I was about to ask Tseng what the hell he was doing when I saw what had stopped him.

SOLDIER.

The main doors of the Tower were blocked off, completely barricaded and guarded by pompous-looking pretty boys in black uniforms, carrying guns over their shoulders like goddamn parasols. At least a dozen black vans were parked carelessly across the carpark with the word S.O.L.D.I.E.R stamped across them, and the Shinra company logo.

What the hell was going on?

"The fuck is the Brat Brigade doing here?" I growled, jumping out of the car with Tseng, leaving it parked haphazardly in the middle of the concrete.

"Enough." Tseng snapped, striding towards the doors so fast that I nearly had to fucking jog to keep up. "Be professional, Reno. Soldier provide an important service to Shinra. They're every bit as important as you or I."

Yeah right. Why did I not believe a single word that was coming out of that lying mouth of his? It sounded like he was reading it from a textbook.

Not surprising really. It wasn't a hugeass secret that SOLDIER and us hated the damn sight of each other. I'd gotten into way too many fistfights with the sons of bitches to even think about acting professional. They were just underworked, overpaid prettyboys. All brawn, no brains. They got all the easy jobs, all the praise, and all the damn glory.

Hence the nickname: The Brat Brigade.

The Turks were just the scum Shinra had dragged outta the slums because we were useful. We were overworked, underpaid, got all the hard, dirty jobs... and everybody with any damn sense avoided us like a case of Syphillis. We were the badly kept secret, the bastard sons, and every stupid fucking SOLDIER I'd ever met looked at me like I wasn't worthy of breathing the same air as him.

Which is exactly the expression this son of a bitch walking up to us was wearing - his nose so high in the air it was about to take off from his face.

"Where do you think you two are going?" The SOLDIER barked gruffly, looking us both up and down in disdain. His eyes lingered on the bloody dressing on my head, the goggles, the wrinkled suit and the half-buttoned shirt. I slouched just a little more than usual and smirked insolently, lighting up a cig. SOLDIER were always so far up their own asses about uniform I'm surprised they could breathe.

Tseng stood up straight, his hands clasped in front of him professionally and a neutral yet somehow so intimidating look on his face. "As of 10pm last night, this building still housed Shinra Inc's main headquarters." He said slowly, smoothly, with just the tiniest goddamn hint of psychotic dislike. "Has this changed in the last ten hours?"

The SOLDIER guy looked a little taken aback, but didn't stop looking at Tseng like he was dirt. "I don't see why-"

"And," Tseng said calmly, taking a step closer, "please tell me if I'm mistaken, but I recall that the Turk offices are still situated on the 69th floor... directly beneath the President's office."

Now was it just me, or was this turning into some kind of verbal pissing contest? I looked from one to the other. From a distance it mighta looked like they were just having a normal conversation, with the slouching, jackass of a redhead standing nearby, but there was some kind of verbal 'mine's bigger than yours' starting to happen here. I smirked as the soldier guy puffed out his chest like an indignant pidgeon.

"You don't have authorization to go in... sir." The last word was smothered in sarcasm. The guy sneered it, and a few of the others who had gathered to listen in started sniggering. I aint a patient man, as you might have noticed. I bristled, ready to fly at the guy and rip his face off. Sure he had muscles, but that wouldn't matter if I shoved my EMR up his ass.

Tseng though, he didn't even fucking blink. He just smiled calmly, coldly.

"Apparently neither do you."

The laughter stopped. Tseng smiled wider. "Upon who's authority are you barring entrance?"

"Mister Heidigger's. Nobody gets in this building right now without permission. Not even you."

And then the front doors slid open.

"You two! What d'you think you're doing out here?"

Heidigger came wobbling through the sliding doors, pushing bewildered SOLDIERs out the way, or punching the assholes if they didn't move fast enough. The SOLDIER guy in front of us turned and blinked, his stupid mouth open and a look of confusion on his face as Heidigger waddled towards us, looking like a ball of damn snot with a beard.

"Mister Heidigger, sir!" Said the SOLDIER, standing so far to attention it looked like someone had just shoved one of those guns up his ass, "I was just telling these... gentlemen that they have no auth-"

"Out of my way!" Heidigger roared, pushing the idiot so hard that he flew off his feet and to the floor with a grunt. Okay, so Heidigger is a bloodthirsty, abusive fat bastard with six damn chins, but hey, at least he was good for entertainment.

"Heidigger." Tseng greeted him calmly, nodding politely. Heidigger slapped him on the shoulder. Generally the fat asshole was a bastard to everyone, but for some godforsaken reason he had a soft spot for Tseng. Probably because he was the only damn person in Shinra who wasn't afraid of him. "What's happened?"

Heidigger waved his hand in the air, as if trying to swat away a swarm of flies. "Not out here! Get up to President Shinra's office and you'll get your question answered. Need to know only. Don't know what little pissants are listening."

Tseng nodded again with just a flicker of a smirk on his face as Heidigger turned and wobbled back in, punching SOLDIERS as he hurried past, apparently just for the hell of it.

The SOLDIER guy started scrambling back onto his feet, a look of confusion on his face. Tseng glanced down briefly and smiled.

"Enjoy your guard duty." He said politely, and then walked away.

As soon as the lift doors had closed, I looked at Tseng with an eyebrow raised and snorted. "You fucking hypocrite."

Tseng turned to look at me with a questioning look on his face. The lift hummed upwards. I leaned against the wall, smirking at him. "Tellin' me to be professional. What the hell was professional about that?"

Tseng raised both eyebrows at me calmly, though he did start smirking back at me.

"I think you'll find that I was extremely polite."

I snorted again. "You're a fucking hypocrite, Tseng, and you damn well know it."

The floor numbers flickered past painfully slowly. If there's one damn thing I hate about Shinra tower, it was the elevators. I swear I could ride a turtle up the damn stairs faster than these stupid things. No wait, I think I could probably climb the building using only my lips, and reach the top faster than this.

I yawned after a few minutes and gave up looking at the view, taking a glance at Tseng. He was staring at the wall thoughtfully, obviously doing some of that deep thought stuff that I found so hard.

"You think this is gonna be big trouble?"

Tseng blinked, as if only just remembering I was there with him. "...possibly."

Yeah. Thanks for the great conversation, Tseng. Not like I'm bored or anything.

"Tseng?"

"Hmmm?"

"Talk to me?"

His lip twitched upwards in acknowledgement and he turned to look at me.

"What would you like me to talk about, Reno?"

I opened my mouth... and then shut it again. Considering all the shit that had happened recently, and all the things that we could possibly discuss, I suddenly couldn't think of a damn thing to say, besides talking dirty to him, but then again, dirty talk was kinda banned during work hours.

Tseng smirked knowingly. "How's your head?"

I tensed. I practically saw the cogs turning in the guy's head, and I could sense he was trying to back me into a corner about what had happened last night. I tried to shrug it off.

"Absolutely fucking fine, boss. It was only a scratch."

Tseng's eyes narrowed just slightly. I decided to look incredibly interested in the smog-covered cityscape out the window, that I'd seen thousands of damn times before.

"Reno."

Ugh. That was his warning tone. Why did the bastard have to be so perceptive. You have any idea how annoying it is when your boss (and your lover) has a fucking built-in lie detector?

"Look, the fatass seemed pretty serious down there. Let's just concentrate on the job, huh?"

Okay, now he was _really_ suspicious. And I felt like I was gonna vomit at the words that had just come outta my mouth. Nonetheless, Tseng turned back to staring at the wall like a statue, probably thinking about what torture to put me through until I blabbed.

After what felt like a decade, the lift shuddered to a halt on the top floor and we stepped out.

It was chaos.

SOLDIER were everywhere. And I ain't talking about the entitled pretty-boy wannabes here, I'm talking about First Class, with muscles bigger than their damn heads, bulging in their tanktops like some of the chicks I'd picked up in my most drunken nights out. Heidigger was on the phone, standing in the middle of the red carpet that ran up the staircases, screaming obsenities at some poor bastard on the other end. Scarlet, Palmer, Hojo, and some of the other kiss-ass executives were just milling round the chaos looking lost, but there was something - someone missing.

I took a nervous side glance at that door - the door I fucking shuddered to walk past, and my eyes widened.

"Boss..."

"I see it." Tseng muttered, frowning at the door.

Rufus' door was shattered. The lock looked like someone had vented all their anger on it kung-fu style. It was hanging off it's hinges, swinging loosely, and what was inside was even worse. The desk was cleared - computer on it's side on the floor, papers strewn across the plush carpet. The window looked like it had a couple of head-shaped cracks spider-webbing across it, and the chair looked like it had been ripped to shreds by someone with serious anger issues. Rufus was nowhere to be seen.

"Make sure it gets done NOW." Heidigger bellowed down the phone, then snapped it shut, cursing to himself. He turned to the guy I could only guess was head of Soldier and nodded. "The president is three minutes out. Get to the helipad and meet him." The SOLDIERS nodded and ran up the sweeping staircase, leaving just us and a few bewildered executives in the hallway.

"Sir, can you fill us in?" Tseng said calmly, but his face looked just a little paler than usual. My stomach was churning, my throat had gone dry, and my head was banging even more than before. I knew, even before Heidigger opened his fat, bushy mouth, exactly what he was gonna say, but hearing it out loud still sent me to a whole new level of hell.

"Boys, I'm putting all Turk resources on this. No other missions. The Vice President has been kidnapped."


	16. Chapter 16

Chapter 16

If, when I kick the bucket, someone decides I deserve my own, specially-tailored to fit version of Hell, I'm pretty sure this would be it: being told by an angry, bearded blancmange that a psychotic rapist who wants to screw me to death has been kidnapped, and it's my damn job to save him.

Well, actually, I guess my idea of hell would probably be along the lines of eternal sobriety, but this came in a pretty close second.

I squeezed my eyes shut and shook my head, like a dog trying to get rid of a flea. My ears were ringing. Was this just some kind of sick joke? I could hear Heidigger and Tseng having a deep, serious conversation about the situation - tactics, possibilities... y'know, all the stuff I was meant to be thinking about right now, being the complete professional I am. The only problem was that my brain didn't seem to wanna work. You know that white snowy shit that happens to the TV when it's broken? That's pretty much what the inside of my head felt like right now. It was broken, and to be honest I don't think the damn TV repair guy could help with this one.

The one thought that managed to work its way through all the static was this: I hoped whoever had taken the son of a whore was torturing the hell out of him.

Yeah... I've never been much for the whole forgiveness thing.

"...find out who did this? SOLDIER seem to be preoccupied."

"You think I'd trust those fuckers with this? Needs to stay confidential. The public gets hold of this and Shinra loses face."

"I understand. I'll remind my Turks to keep this classified."

I tore my eyes away from the doorway as Tseng turned to look at me. Yaknow, he always amazed me with just how fucking easily he could hide his emotions. I mean come on, Tseng hated the bastard almost as much as I did, but still right now he looked just like a concerned employee.

"Understand, Reno? No rumour spreading... even if you're trying to impress a woman."

I blinked stupidly at the comment. I really didn't feel like playing the part of my old self right now, all I wanted was to go home, get back in bed and sleep til all this shit was over. Thankfully, Scarlet had been listening in and let off one of her stupid, ear splitting cackles, saving me the job of coming up with something witty.

Tseng's eyes flashed at me and then he cleared his throat. I could hear the helicopter landing on the helipad up above. Shinra was obviously arriving, All the executives started parading up to the President's office.

"Tseng. Get this situation in hand. Drop the damn plate if you have to, just find Rufus!"

With that, Heidigger turned and practically ran up the stairs, pushing everyone out of the way to get to the front, like the kiss ass he was.

I and Tseng just stood there for a minute, the only damn people left in the hallway. I felt like I'd suddenly gone deaf.

"Tseng."

"Reno?"

"..." I gulped, trying to think of something not completely stupid and obvious to say. "...this is fucked up."

Ok, not remotely helpful, but I felt like I was going insane here. How was I meant to do this?

What surprised me was Tseng's reaction. He looked around furtively, then leaned back against the wall and sighed, pinching the bridge of his nose.

"I know."

I've never been one for following orders, which, y'know, is kind of surprising considering my damn career choice; but I was stumped here. If Tseng had any suggestions, I was all ears.

"The fuck do we do?"

He stayed like that for a few minutes, eyes closed, letting himself have one of those rare moments of weakness. Up above I could hear voices and footsteps. Shinra had arrived. The corporate ass-kissing had begun.

Tseng took a deep breath and then stood up straight, shoulders back, his face once again completely devoid of human emotion, like he could just turn the damn thing on and off whenever he wanted. He watched me seriously for a second. The static in my brain cleared. Just a little.

"We do our job, Reno."

He turned on the spot and walked with dignity down the stairs, with a bewildered, pale, and shaky as fuck Reno in tow.

"You heard about Rufus?"

Rude was standing outside Tseng's office, a cup of coffee in his hand.

"You think we've been talking to Heidigger for the last half hour for fucking fun?" I muttered, kicking the trash can on my way past, like it had just insulted my Mom or something.

... if I had a Mom.

Let's get this straight: my head is fucked up. So fucked up that if I went for therapy, my therapist would need a damn therapist by the time we were done. Not that anybody would bother to psychoanalyse a Turk, but still... the point is that my brain has worked out its own defence mechanisms, and this was one of them: frustration, fear... fuck anything that I couldn't handle ended up turning into anger. At least if I couldn't solve my problems, I could feel better by kicking the flying shit out of something.

"If you damage company property, Reno, you will pay for it out of your wages." Tseng said emotionlessly.

I glared at the back of his stupid, over-brushed, way too shiny fucking hair, and wished it was on fire.

Rude looked me up and down and nodded. "You feelin' better?"

"Fan-fucking-tastic." I snapped. Rude grunted.

"Shame. I wanted your porn."

Tseng cleared his throat, as usual when me and Rude were being assholes. He turned, his hand on the door handle, and stared both of us down. Not that I needed it right now.

"All missions are cancelled. Our only concern is with the kidnapping. Rude, ring security and get them to find out how the kidnappers managed to reach Rufus' office without a keycard. Reno," Tseng looked at me carefully for just a fraction of a second - nowhere near long enough for the meaning to penetrate Rude's thick skull. I just glared back angrily. I couldn't deal with Tseng's mixed as fuck signals right now. "...we need to discuss how you got that head wound."

He held the door open for me. I considered - for a brief second - turning around and walking the hell out. I could find a crappy little bar, get out my face and kick the shit out of any son of a bitch who looked at me. Sure, I'd have a hangover and probably a few broken ribs tomorrow, but a few hours of being so pissed I couldn't remember my own damn name, let alone my shitty situation, seemed like bliss right now.

But Tseng's eyes still had some kind of power, even on self-destructive, angry-at-everything Reno. I couldn't just walk away. Tseng was as thrown by this crap as me. I couldn't just abandon the son of a bitch.

I walked past him, still glaring as I threw myself down into the chair opposite his desk. He closed the door and walked slowly round me, staring at me like I'd just grown an extra couple of heads.

"What?!" I snapped. Apparently I was also feeling suicidal today.

"Your anger is not going to help the situation." He snapped back icily. I sank back in my chair.

"What d'you expect, Tseng? Should I be fucking jumping for joy? If Shinra expects me to look for his precious little piece of shit, he can fuck himself. I hope the bastard dies."

I'd never mouthed off like this at Tseng in my whole damn life. Sure I'd cracked a few times, but flatly refusing to do a mission? If I had been anyone else, he probably would have shot me where I sat.

"No you don't." Tseng said quietly, restrainedly, walking away from me towards the filing cabinet. I gritted my teeth.

"Yeah I do. You have any goddamn idea-"

"No you don't!" Tseng shouted, turning around and slamming his hand down forcefully on the edge of the desk. I shut my mouth in shock at the look of rage on his face. I'd never seen it before. Tseng had gotten angry plenty of times - mostly at me - but he'd never shouted. He'd always been cold and angry. I'd always thought that was terrifying as hell, but this? This was a new level of fear, and it completely shut me up, like he'd just superglued my lips together.

He clenched his jaw, I think trying to control his anger. There was a fucking awful silence as he stood staring at me, those normally lidded and way too calm eyes wide and almost completely insane. For a second I wondered if the guy had finally snapped, but then he passed a hand slowly over his face and brushed his hair back into place. His eyes were lidded again, but he was still staring at me intensely. The next time he spoke he sounded calmer.

"Reno, you know precisely what will happen to you, if you refuse this assignment." He leaned further forward and stared at me even more intently, if that was even possible. "You know what I will be expected to do. "

I gulped. there was emotion in his eyes again, and I could practically see the damn scenario playing out in my head. Tseng lowered his head and his shoulders sank a little. "Rufus Shinra may not deserve to be rescued, but President Shinra loves him. He will not look the other way if you refuse to find his son. Would you really force me to shoot you, just so that he dies, too?"

There was a look of pain on Tseng's face now, and I suddenly understood why he was trying to be so calm; so professional about all this shit. The idea hit me like a brick to the face.

Turks are only kept around as long as they're useful. We're like pets: it's all good so long as we can fetch the paper and slippers and chase the damn cats away; but as soon as we start dragging our asses across the living room floor and taking a crap on the master's bed, it's pretty much all over for us. I let the glare fall away as I stared into Tseng's eyes. The scenario in my head was really not something I wanted to come true.

I put a hand up to my aching head and closed my eyes.

"Can we just go back to bed and fuck? We can pretend this shit never happened."

Yeah, I'd just broken the taboo, but then, screaming at me wasn't exactly professional either. I heard Tseng sink into his leather chair with a creak and lean backwards. "By all means. As long as you're the one who tells Heidigger."

"...maybe not then."

I peered an eye open a little. Tseng was sitting back, calm again, a weak smile at the edges of his lips. The only thing that gave away everything wasn't what it seemed was how damn white he looked.

"So... we look for the scumbag?"

He nodded gravely. "Yes. Unless you'd rather me, you and Rude take an early... 'retirement'."

I shuffled uncomfortably and tried to act professional. I still felt angry, fucked in the head, and bewildered, but possible impending death beats screwed up coping mechanisms. I blew out a long breath and pulled out a cigarette. On a normal day, even thinking about lighting up in Tseng's office would put you on a charge, but today was one of those rare occasions he didn't object. The guy knew me well enough by now.

It goes like this: Reno + stress = nicotine, caffeine, booze, and violence against inanimate objects.

"Where the hell do we start?"

Tseng leaned forwards, placing his hands on the desk. "Yuro Miaki."

I blinked stupidly. "'I'm a what?"

Even as stressed out as he was, Tseng still couldn't resist smirking at my complete dumbassedness. "The Wutaian, Reno."

"Oh."

I nearly jumped out of my damn skin when the phone started ringing. I'd nearly forgotten we were in Tseng's office, he'd been so out of work mode a few seconds ago.

He stretched out a hand and picked up the receiver of the sleek, old-fashioned phone, frowning in concentration. I leaned back in my chair and crossed my legs as he listened to whoever was on the other end. After a moment his eyes snapped up to my face, eyes narrowed seriously. My heart leapt in my chest, like someone had just charged a couple of hundred volts through it. Whoever was on the other end of that phoneline was talking about me, and something told me it wasn't that I'd just won a trip to Costa Del Sol.

"I see." Said Tseng gravely, still watching me with that penetrating stare. "You'd better get down to the Security office and establish what happened. " With that he put the phone carefully back down, sitting back slowly.

"...what?" I blurted, my throat suddenly dry. Tseng interlaced his long fingers and surveyed me carefully over the top of them.

"...Show me your ID card."

...that was not what I had been expecting. I shook my head, trying to clear out my ears. "Huh?"

"Your ID card, Reno. Show it to me."

It aint unusual for me to be confused as fuck. 90% of the time I don't know what the hell's going on, drunk or sober; but what the hell my ID card had to do with that phonecall was about as clear as a brick wall. Tseng was the boss, though. I sighed and searched my pockets for the scratched up piece of plastic, Tseng's eyes still boring into me like a pair of drills.

It wasn't there.

I frowned in confusion and started checking the jacket again, as though it was gonna magically appear there if I hoped hard enough. Tseng waved his hand as a signal for me to stop.

"Don't bother." He said, that grave tone in his voice again. I gulped. I was in deep, deep crap. "At 2am this morning, Floor 70 was accessed by a Shinra ID card. _Your_ ID card."

I felt like Tseng had just made me swallow a fucking anvil.

"Now," He growled dangerously, leaning forwards across the desk, "you are going to tell me _what the hell_ happened in that bar last night."

* * *

><p><strong>Guys!<strong> To anyone who has had the absolute patience of a saint with me on this fic - thank you. It will be continued, but for one thing I needed a break - I really get into my characters, and having spent oh... about 5 years writing inside the mind of Reno, I _desperately_ needed a break. I'm in my final year of uni now, which means that I have craploads of work to do (I'm writing a novel for my dissertation, gods help me), and my head is also full of The Master and the Doctor from Doctor Who (which I'm currently working on); however I will be returning to finish this post-degree, and post-Doctor Who fanfic. I've loved the Turks since my early teens, and at the ripe old age of 27, those screwed up, foul-mouthed hitmen still have a very deep and special place in my dark and twisty heart.

Much, much love to everyone. Reno and Tseng will be back soon 3


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